The Apartment

Ray drew in on himself. He was very worried about Andy — about his boyfriend — and there was a feeling in him that nobody would understand; after all, his parents, his former friends at school, they wouldn't have. He sat quietly in the living room for a while, hoping Andy would come home, then started to walk back towards his room — their room — with slumped shoulders.

Mikey noticed. He darted down the hall and pulled Ray to himself. "Whoa, dude!" he said. "Talk to me!"

Ray turned, and saw the caring in the redhead's face. "I don't know what happened to him!" he said, and burst into tears.

Mikey pulled him into a hug, "Easy, Ray," he said. "Let it out." Behind Ray's head, he motioned for help. First Pauly, then Donny, Chay, and finally Peewee converged on them, turning it into a group hug.

"Don't cry, Ray," Peewee said. "He'll come home."

"Andy knows the neighborhood," Chay added. "He'll be back. Peewee's right."

And it came home to Ray that these guys counted him a brother, that they understood and welcomed his feelings for Andy, that they cared.

Three knocks on the door broke the group hug. Ray's hopes soared. Peewee broke and ran for the door.

It was, however, not Andy; instead, the person at the door was Dorothy, the nurse from the clinic.

"Don, Van said to apologize for sending me here, but he's got a case he just plain can't leave," she said. "I understand the need for confidentiality about this place. But he thought someone should come check on Jack, and I was available."

Donny was clearly not pleased, but he understood the necessity. "Come back this way," he said. Peewee gave her a hug. Ray decided to do the same, as she arrived where he was, near the bathroom on the way back to the bedrooms. Surprised, she hugged him back.

"Guess that makes you officially a Friend of Dorothy," Chay said with a mischievous grin. The older boys broke into laughter, as did Dorothy; Ray looked confused — until Mikey whispered him the explanation, at which point he blushed deep red, which caused the laughter to redouble.

Followed by all the boys, Dorothy then went to Mikey and Pauly's bedroom, where she checked Jack over. The bruises around his head and on his sides were worse looking, but she said that was actually a sign of healing. She checked the blood pressure readings that Pauly had recorded carefully, and took his current blood pressure. The inflammation around his anus was going down, though it still looked pretty bad. She tut-tutted over his fluid intake — "It's supposed to be regulated, not too much, not too little."

"Don, I honestly think he needs to be admitted," she said.

"You know why I'd prefer not, for both Jack's sake and everyone else's," he answered her.

"I'm looking at it from what's medically appropriate for him," she replied. "But you don't work the clinic as long as I have without realizing there are other issues affecting such decisions. Let me call Van." And with that she pulled out a cellphone.

"Van? Dorothy. Listen, I'm at Don's, and in my considered opinion, this boy needs hospitalization. Don's concerned, and we both know his reasons." She listened for a few minutes, then said, "We can do that" and hung up.

"Van will call Gil," she said to Donny. "They were prepared for something like this to happen sooner or later. If I can get your help to get Jack to my car, and have Paul ride along with me, I'll do the transport, and make it look like it's a referral from the clinic, with Van as admitting physician. That'll protect the rest of you, and you know you can count on Gil."

Donny nodded, clearly more at ease. "I hate to put him out like that," he said.

"You need to draw on the resources you have available," Dorothy told him, "and not try to do everything by yourself. You know Van or I would do anything we can, and your Gil seems to feel the same way."

"I suppose," Donny said, clearly dubious.

With much effort, which might have been comedic if it weren't so serious, they managed to get a sweatsuit on Jack, and trundled him out to Dorothy's car. Pauly climbed in, and they were off.

The boys went back down the walkway and into the apartment. Andy's being missing struck Ray again with renewed force.

After the support he'd gotten, the group hug and all, he knew he couldn't retreat into himself, as he'd been accustomed to do, but he wasn't sure what to do. He dithered over it.

Donny was flopped in an easy chair; Chay stood behind it, gently massaging his shoulders. "He'll be all right, Donny," he said, "and you know you can count on them."

Ray realized he wasn't the only one with problems, and went over to see if he could do anything. "Chay, I want to help, and I don't know what to do," he said bleakly, seeking guidance.

"Neither do I, Ray," Chay answered him. "Donny always tries to protect us all, including sometimes from ourselves — and Jack's risky behavior has been something that's always worried us. Regardless of what we say or do, he's going to take this as a personal failure, something he feels he could have prevented — even though logically he knows he couldn't have."

"I should have stopped him," Donny said. "I knew the risks he was taking; I should have done something."

Ray felt a sense of what he needed to do come over him. Hesitantly but with a sense of certitude, he moved forward, and slipped in on Donny's lap, lifting up his head and shoulders, which were slumped forward, in order to fit in.

"You did," he said. "Just like you did for Chay and Peewee and Mikey and Pauly and me." And Andy, echoed in his mind. "You gave him a safe place to be. He's the one that took the risks, you're the one that made it possible for him to avoid them, if he'd been willing to. Don't blame yourself that he gambled and lost; you gave him a way not to gamble, if he'd been willing to stick to it."

Chay, still standing behind the chair and massaging Donny's shoulders, gave Ray a smile that was at once poignant, filled with gratitude, and resigned. And something finally clicked in Ray's mind, something he filed away for later.

Ray snuggled in to give Donny such comfort as he could, noticing how thin Donny was, and both acutely aware of Donny's dick, noticeable even soft, pressing against his thigh, and feeling guilty that he even thought of that at a time like this.

Peewee came over and clambered up on Donny's other side, giving Donny a gentle kiss on the cheek. They sat like that for an indeterminate time, the two younger boys cuddled up in an attempt to comfort Donny and Chay continuing to stand behind him, alternating massage, caress, and just gentle presence, no one willing to move and break the effect.

The now-familiar three knocks interrupted the tableau after a time Ray couldn't estimate, and wasn't particularly trying to. Mikey said, "I'll get it," and went to the door.

Andy came home. Ray was up out of Donny's lap and in his arms in an instant, covering him in relieved kisses. Chay and Mikey covered grins that were at once amused and relieved. Peewee however was a different story. "Ray and Andy sittin' in a tree...." he started chanting. Ray blushed, then gave a little laugh and swatted at Peewee's bottom; he danced out of the way, and confronted Andy. "Where you been!?" he demanded.

'That's a good question,' thought Ray, but held his peace.

"I hid out for a while, first out behind the clinic, then in the library," Andy said. "The way Danny had me take off, I was right by the back door of the clinic, and there's always guys hanging out there, smoking and talking. I figured I'd fit right in, and be overlooked if anyone decided to check. Nobody did, though. So after talking with Rodge and Allen for a bit, I walked, bold as you please, down to the library. I figured running or taking alleys would make me obvious, but a kid walking down the sidewalk can't possibly be somebody who's being looked for. So I spent a half hour on the internet, then took a book and read for a bit. Then, when I figured the excitement had worn off, I headed back home."

"Good thinking," Danny said.

"But you had us all worried, especially Ray," Mikey added.

Chay motioned Andy and Ray into the kitchen. "Excuse me, Ray, but I'm using you for cover, as if what I want to say concerns the two of you. Andy, Dorothy showed up here while you were gone, and she and Pauly took Jack to the hospital."

Andy looked startled. "He got worse?"

"I think it was more, he wasn't getting better, or at least not fast enough," Chay said. "Anyway, Dorothy called Van, and then they told Donny it was best if he got admitted."

"Listen, he's taking it hard," Chay went on. "You know him: everything that happens to us is somehow his responsibility, to prevent anything bad and make anything good happen. He's blaming himself that Jack got, well, you know."

"Oh, fun," Andy said. "Well, count on me."

"And me," Ray interjected.

"I knew I could," Chay said.

---

 

Donny insisted on going to the hospital that night. Chay could not dissuade him; after a few efforts, he stopped trying, accurately gauging how much Donny needed to make sure Jack was okay.

Andy cooked dinner — a Hamburger Helper dish he enhanced with some hot sauce. Mikey and Peewee sat it out, and ate a bowl of soup and potato chips instead — Mikey because he couldn't handle overly spicy food, Peewee because he just didn't care for the taste of what Andy'd made. Nobody made a fuss about it, though — it was one of the small ways the boys accommodated themselves to each other that you could opt out of something like a group meal, but were then responsible for taking care of yourself.

Pauly came home shortly after the meal, and ate up what was left. He said Donny planned to stay there for the evening, keeping vigil over Jack.

Chay's expression was less than happy, but all he did was motion Mikey over, whisper something to him, and vanish into the bedrooms. Shortly thereafter, he came back out, dressed to go out into the evening chill. Pauly lifted eyebrows. "Going to go see my insurance agent," Chay said flatly. Pauly covered up momentary startlement well, but Ray noticed it flash across his face. He stayed quiet.

Andy dragged Mikey, Ray, and Peewee into a card game, but nobody's heart was really in it.

Peewee brought the game to an end when he sat up with a stubborn, nearly angry look on his face and said, "I'm not dumb, you know!"

"Nobody called you dumb," Andy replied.

"You guys treat me as dumb!" Peewee said. "Keepin' stuff from me, and all that kinda stuff."

Mikey placed his hands firmly but gently on the 11-year-old's shoulders and turned him until they were looking eye-to-eye. "We don't, you know. We love you, and we just try to protect you."

"Yeah. I'm just a kid, so I get to worry about what's happenin', while the rest of you know, and won't tell me," Peewee said defiantly.

"It's not like that at all," Mikey said. "Just — there's a lot of crap in life, and if we don't have to dump it on you, we try to keep from doin' it — because we love you. But nobody's keeping anything from you intentionally, purposely."

"Like what?" Peewee asked, curious now.

"Well," Mikey said, "for example, there are guys who would enjoy someone licking their butthole with their tongue."

"Ewww! Gross!" said Peewee.

"See what I mean?" Mikey asked. "Nobody particularly wanted to keep that fact from you, but the idea grossed you out, so we just plain didn't mention it."

"Now, what's on your little mind?" Andy asked. "Maybe we can help fight the worries with you."

"Well — what happened to Jack? Where's Donny? Where did Chay go? Why was Ray so worried about you?" It was like someone had pulled a plug, and it all came flooding out of the youngest boy.

"I was worried because we ran in different directions, and he didn't come home right away," Ray said.

"And because he loves me and that got him worried," Andy added. Ray blushed; Peewee giggled.

"I'm glad Andy's got you; he was sad before, and now he's happy," Peewee said to Ray.

And, simple as it sounded, that opened a new understanding for Ray. For Peewee, it was simple: if it makes people happy, it's good; if it makes them sad, it's bad. Their love was good because it made Andy happy. The direct logic of a child had pierced the guilt he'd been feeling, and his relieved smile was radiant. "Thank you, Peewee," he said happily.

"For what?" Peewee asked.

"For making me see through your eyes," Ray said. "You understand stuff that grownups make complicated."

"Oh," Peewee answered. "Well, you're welcome." He gave Ray a hug.

"Okay, let's tackle the other stuff," Mikey said, mostly to Peewee. "Donny went to the hospital to be with Jack. That's the easiest one to answer. And you know why he did that."

"'Cause he always tries to take care of everybody," Peewee said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Yep," Mikey said. "He does. And he blames himself for not stopping Jack from getting hurt."

"How did Jack get hurt?" Peewee asked.

The three teens looked at each other. Mikey drew a breath. "You like watching me and Pauly, right?" he asked.

Peewee giggled. "Uh-huh!" he agreed.

"Well, tell me what I like Pauly to do," Mikey led Peewee on.

"You lay on your back and pick your legs up and put 'em on Pauly's shoulders," Peewee said. "Then he sticks his big ol' dick into your bottom. And you like that!" Peewee was giggling madly at this, and his shorts were tented.

Mikey blushed. "Yeah, I do. You know how good sex stuff makes you feel, right?"

"Uh huh!" (Giggles.)

"That's what it does for me."

"You squirt all over yourself," Peewee giggled.

"That I do." Mikey was embarrassed but pushing on with this. Ray wondered why he was.

"Okay, so you've got the picture — I like that, Pauly likes doing it — and you like watching it. And I kind of like him pounding it into me; you've seen that." The redhead's face was bright red, but he pushed on. "Now imagine Jack in the same position., with one of those guys from down at the machine shop doing what Pauly does. That's what Jack likes. He likes having them dominate him like that, for some reason."

Peewee's attention was fixed on Mikey. A bigger kid was finally explaining stuff to him, and he was rapt on the explanation."

"The problem was, there's a fine line between what Jack likes, and getting too rough. The guys he was with crossed that line, and messed him up pretty bad."

"I get it," Peewee said. "Like the difference between us roughhousing for fun, and that guy that was beating me up."

"Exactly," Andy said. "That's a really good analogy, Peewee. You're pretty smart."

Peewee beamed.

"Donny feels like he should have done something to keep Jack from going and getting roughed up, even though I think he realizes there's not a whole lot he could have done," Mikey finished explaining.

"That's dumb; he couldn't have stopped Jack, unless he grounded him or something," Peewee said. "And Jack would have left anyways if he did that."

"Yep," Andy said. "That doesn't stop Donny from feeling guilty about it, though."

"So he's staying at the hospital with Jack because he feels guilty about Jack getting beat up?" Peewee asked.

"Pretty much," Ray said, feeling like that at least was something he could say to help.

"Guess I gotta hug him and tell him not to feel bad when he comes home," Peewee said.

"I think that would help a lot," Andy replied. "That's a piece of what makes us brothers that you're the best at." Peewee was grinning ear to ear at hearing that.

"So where did Chay go?" he demanded.

"I was wondering that myself," Ray said. "He said he was going to go see his insurance agent? Something doesn't sound right there."

"Well, that's just where he did go," Mikey replied. "I guess you need some background here." He sat quietly, thinking, for a few seconds; the others remained silent, letting him put it together.

"Do you remember old man McTavish?" he asked Peewee at last.

"Yeah, he was mean," Peewee said vehemently.

"He'll never hurt another little boy again," Mikey said with some anger.

"Good!" Peewee said.

"McTavish was Peewee's introduction to the fact there are men out there that abuse little boys," Mikey explained quietly to Ray and Andy.

"I wouldn't 'a had any problem having sex fun with him," Peewee said. "But he was mean."

"You probably got the picture that when Donny found Chay again, he'd been abused pretty badly," Mikey said to the other two. "You know how young he looks — that makes him attractive to a particular group of people, and some of them are real ...."

"Jerks?" Andy supplied.

"...assholes?" from Ray.

"Both terms work, and I could think of worse," Mikey said. "McTavish was one of them, and that's how Donny and Chay ended up with Peewee — and kind of the start of what we have here. That's pretty much how I got involved, anyway — I was trying to take care of myself in a world where kids' choices for taking care of themselves are pretty limited. When Donny started helping Chay, and then Peewee, I knew I had to take a risk and help him help them."

"That makes sense," Ray said slowly. "But what does that have to do with Chay's insurance agent?"

"Let's be blunt," Mikey said. "Chay was selling himself — trading on the fact he looked like a kid, to get what he needed to live. Some of the creeps he dealt with, they hurt him fairly badly in the process."

"I get that," Ray said slowly. "But...."

"There were a couple of guys attracted to boys who looked like you and Chay that weren't creeps, or at least no more so than being attracted sexually to kids makes them creeps automatically," Mikey went on. "Men who treated Chay decently in exchange for what he gave them, men he felt he could trust."

"We all avoid working the streets as much as possible," Andy put in. "Donny made it possible to survive without it."

"But Chay has two men he knew from his days on the street that treated him right," Mikey said. "And that means he doesn't have to depend on Donny for everything. For Chay, that's important — he's always been the little guy that depends on others. So every once in a while, especially if Donny's done something that upsets him, he goes and visits one or the other of them. He apparently enjoys himself, and he comes home with money he didn't get from Donny. That's a big deal for him."

"How does Donny keep this place going?" Ray asked.

Peewee and Mikey looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, we live in an apartment with water and electric power. Somebody pays the rent, somebody pays the bills." Ray said. "I know from my parents always griping about never having enough money."

"You know, I don't know," Andy said. "I always took that for granted, that we had it."

Mikey stayed silent.

Peewee gave out with a large yawn. It was contagious; they all started yawning.

"Think maybe it's time to crash, guys?" Pauly asked from the couch, where he'd been lying, watching TV and listening in.

"I do," Andy said.

"I guess," Peewee allowed, with a touch of resistance to bedtime.

"Hop on," Pauly said to Peewee, crouching down to give him a piggyback ride. Peewee grinned and hopped on.

Mikey wrapped his arm around Pauly-and-Peewee, and Andy did the same to Ray. Companionably, the two couples and piggyback rider walked back to the bedrooms, where Pauly dumped Peewee onto his bed. "You gonna do stuff? Can I watch?" he said, yawning again. Pauly grinned at him.

Andy and Ray said good night, slipped over to their room, and engaged in a little makeout session of their own. But everything that had happened had worn them out, and before any serious lovemaking went on, they fell asleep in each other's arms.

To be continued....

---

Editor's Notes: Ah, another enlightening and heartwarming chapter of this wonderful new story. We seem to be coming closer and closer to finding out, at least to some extent, just what is going on with the apartment, and the guys that live there. I, for one, can hardly wait to find out what will happen next.

Thanks, D and B for another wonderful story.

Darryl AKA The Radio Rancher