Haven Book Two

 

Sunday night at Haven, everyone was settled for the night, well almost everyone. David was alone in his room. He missed his brother. This was the first time Adam had been gone. Tomorrow was a big day for his brother and he, David, wouldn't be there. David got up, wiped the tears from his eyes and walked next door to his brother's empty room. He sat at the desk and turned on Adam's 'old lap top computer' (gee it is two weeks old) and played a hand of 'Spider Solitaire.' It didn't help, so he went and lay on the bed and buried his face in Adam's pillow. There was a faint scent of his brother; David began to cry again.

 

After crying for several minutes, he thought he heard a voice say, 'He misses you too.'

 

David sat up and looked around; he was still alone in the room. 'I'm over here, David; look at the lap top.'

 

David walked around the desk and there, on the screen, was a cute eight year old boy, looking at him. "Who are you?"

 

'I am Karl.'

 

"Wow! Hi Karl, are you Adam's imaginary friend?"

 

'No, David. I am not imaginary at all and I am separate from Philip, who isn't imaginary either. You could think of me as 'Philip's' son, I guess. I can access things through 'Philip', but I am a separate entity from him, and have my own memory that 'Philip' will not access. I am, actually your special friend. I am here for you, and only you.'

 

"Wow, Kewl. Can I see Adam, and talk to Adam, through you?"

 

'If he is in range of 'Philip', yes you can.' The screen changed to a different picture, and David saw two skeletons cuddled together. 'Sorry about using the X-ray image, but they covered the lap top with dirty clothes, thinking that would give them privacy.'

 

David giggled. "Don't wake them up, Karl. That is really cool."

 

The image of the two boys was quickly replaced by that of a scowling 'Philip', 'Karl,' he said, angrily, 'you know the privacy rules, Private moments are private There are no exceptions, unless they are in danger.'

 

"He was just showing me that Adam was alright." David defended his new friend.

 

'I know, David. That was very close to the line, and it could have been on the other side of it, if the boys were still awake.'

 

"Why would that have made any difference?" David asked.

 

'Philip's' image actually blushed, 'Well believe me, when I say it would have. Let's leave it at that.' Philip disappeared and Karl returned to the screen, giggling.

 

'That was so kewl, I can't believe it; you made him blush. I didn't know we could do that.' Karl said.

 

"Well, why not, you are a real person, and you are my friend." David had indeed accepted Karl as a real person and as a friend.

 

"So, Karl, why would it have made a difference, if they were awake?"

 

'They might have been doing something.'

 

"Like what?"

 

'That's another story and we'll get into it later.' {Was that a clue, TSL?}[Do I want to know? TSL asks.]

 

"Jeez, you sound just like a grown up. Every time something gets interesting, they won't answer."

 

'Jeez, what the heck do I know? Philip hasn't told me, I think he wants us to learn about that stuff together, like real best friends do.'

 

"Yeah, We are, real best friends, I like that a lot. You talk to me, and not like I'm just a little kid."

 

'You aren't a little kid anymore, David. I think we have a lot of fun and adventures ahead of us. Why don't you take this computer back to your room and we can be together all the time.'

 

"Okay, Karl, That's a good idea. Adam doesn't need it anymore, anyway."

 

David carried the laptop and Adam's pillow back to his room and slept quite well.

 

Monday morning, Neal was waking everyone up and noticed the laptop and extra pillow. He smiled, knowingly, but didn't say anything to tease David. {Surprised, huh?}

 

After breakfast, Jim had all the kids report to the library. There were other kids there from Haven Estates and some adults too. The new kids were looking at all the books and the other stuff in the room.

 

"This is like, way kewl, Look at that head." one boy said, pointing to a carved head.

 

Neal looked at it, carefully; he hadn't really noticed it before. He went over and took it off the shelf. It was a boy that looked like he was about ten, there was an inscription on the base, it read:

 

MY BELOVED SHORTY

WHO GAVE ME HIS LIFE

SO I MIGHT LIVE

 

"Wow, that's something. I wonder what that story is all about?" Neal said.

 

"Who carved it?" Patty asked?

 

"Don't know, there's just initials, KJV." Neal replied.

 

Monty replied, "King James Version?"

 

There were boos and hisses.

 

Neal gingerly replaced the head on its stand, as Jim entered the room, and spoke, "Okay, kids, I need all those in first through fifth grade to go with Mrs. Allen." David, Brian, Moe, and three others got up and exited with the friendly looking Mrs. Allen. "Now high schoolers, please follow Mr. Myers." Five older kids got up and left with the tall gray haired, Mr. Myers. There were still sixteen in the library.

 

A pleasant looking woman came forward, "Hello, I'm Mrs. MacLearin, I will be working on English and social studies, Mrs. Foxx will be your science and math instructor." She indicated the other woman; a thirty something, blond, "And Mr. MacNeil will be working on Physical Education and other special subjects with you. Let's see how things divide up, shall we? Let's have sixth graders over by the door, seventh graders in the back and eighth graders by the window."

 

The kids all moved to their places. The sixth grade group was Neal, Jimmy, Patrick, Samuel and three girls. The seventh grade group had three girls and two boys and the eighth grade group was Monty, Patty, the two reformed bullies (Sean and Jason) and two girls.

 

Mrs. MacLearin said, "Well, that works out well. We will keep you in grade levels for now. Why don't you all take a seat somewhere, while we cover some basic stuff?" The kids all sat and each adult took a turn explaining to them, what they expected from each student. Basically they would get a short 'class' each day, where they would get their assignments, then they would have time to work independently. They could ask any questions when they needed to and get all the individual help necessary. Mr. Frank would be taking them for physical education for about an hour each day. He said that they would do things like swimming, horseback riding, cross country running, dance and team sports. The kids were pretty excited about the whole program. The Home School supplies had arrived and they were given their books, and then dismissed for the day.

 

Mrs, Johnson served lunch for the whole gang and then those not living in the manor house went home, except for Sean and Jason, who went to the stable to work.

 

Monty and Patty went to his room and closed the door. Patty gave him a big hug and a very hot steamy kiss, he responded quite well to that. "Monty, I want to talk to you about stuff."

 

He took a deep breath, "Okay, Patty, what kind of stuff?"

 

"Sex stuff." Patty shifted uncomfortably. "I need to explain some things to you, before we go very far. I don't want you getting your feelings hurt or anything."

 

Monty tried to shift so a certain part of his anatomy wasn't bent double. "Okay, so..."

 

"Okay, I was used badly by my stepfather. I mean he did it to me. It hurt really bad the first few times he did it. Then, I kind of just went numb when he would do it. Sometimes he was gentle and used his tongue, and I kind of liked that, but usually he was very rough and did his thing and left real quickly." Patty was sobbing as the memories flashed through her mind.

 

Monty sat on the bed, pulled her down beside him and hugged her. He rocked gently, while stroking her back. When she had calmed down, Monty told her, softly, "Its okay. I knew some of that. I don't expect all that stuff."

 

"No, Monty, you don't understand, I want it. Well some of it, anyway. I want it with love, not cold and sterile like he did it. I want to do it with someone who cares about ME, not just himself. I want to do it with you, Monty."

 

"Jeez, Patty."

 

"You sound just like Neal."

 

"Patty! Ah... I don't know what to say. I mean... I've done some stuff with Todd, but not as much as everybody thinks."

 

"That's okay, Monty, really." Patty took a deep breath. "I don't want to do it right now. But I want to do it... sometime. I just want you to know that I do want to."

 

"Yeah, well I want to, too. I just don't know anything about giving a girl good feelings."

 

"Well, I only know what that monster liked to do. You can teach me how to please you."

 

Monty hugged Patty and they just held each other and gently rubbed each other's backs.

 

Down the hall, Patrick was in Neal's room. "Neal, are you okay with me being gay?"

 

"Duh! Remember what I said. I don't know about me, but if you know, that's cool. I like you for who you are. You're a cool kid, and we get along great. The sex stuff is fun, and I like it and all, but I ain't ready to make any decisions yet, that will change the rest of my life."

 

"Ah, well then, how about a decision to change the afternoon?" Pat asked, as he reached out and rubbed Neal's thigh.

 

It was dinner time when they left the room.

 

After dinner, they got a call from Tom, Leo, Todd and Adam. They were all very excited about how well Adam was doing. They would be leaving in the morning and should arrive home sometime Wednesday. The travelers got filled in on the new 'school'. Todd and Adam were teased about being behind already. There were several crude comments that you would expect from boys that age {or editors}. (Watch it bud, I can make you sound like a real dunce with just the slip of a key, here and there, so don't get me riled. RR) [I am staying out of this one. TSL]

 

All too soon everyone went to bed. It was a 'school night' so everyone went to their own bed. At about three o'clock in the morning, David woke up, someone was calling his name. The laptop was on, and he looked to see Karl, there on the screen. "'Karl', it's the middle of the night. What's going on?"

 

'I know that, silly. It is 03:04:27 Eastern Standard Time, to be exact. I thought you might like to talk to your brother.'

 

David was up and in his desk chair in a flash. Karl faded out, and Adam was there with a startled look on his face. "David?" he whispered.

 

"Yeah, It's me. I have your other laptop and it woke me up and said you were up."

 

"Thanks, Philip. I couldn't sleep; I'm still so excited. I got up and was asking Philip how you were doing. Then you appeared."

 

"I was really missing you last night, Adam, and I went to your room. Your computer helped me through it. It said I should keep it, since you had a new one. I wasn't stealing your stuff, really, Adam, I'm so sorry."

 

"Hey, little brother, chill, dude. No problem, I'm sorry I didn't think of that before I left. Consider it your computer, now. Man, I have really missed you, Bro. It is probably good that you stayed there though; we are pretty bored most of the time. Dad and Daddy Doc try to find stuff for us to do, and we have had a pretty good time here, but the trip is long and sitting there in the van, hour after hour, gets old very fast. Even with 'Philip' there to help."

 

The brothers shared the events of the past few days and time flew by. 'It is now 04:00 and time that both of you were off to bed.' Each boy heard a different voice tell them. They said their goodnights, and their computers shut down.

 

As David climbed back in bed, he said, "Thanks Karl."

 

'You're welcome, David. I knew you both needed to talk.'

 

"Yeah, thanks. Goodnight." David was asleep before Karl could reply.

 

Now was the slow time, when 'Philip' did his checks on any flagged sites. The local hospital flag had been activated. That meant that there were DNA test results in. It seemed the two boys he had been monitoring had their results in. Sure enough, 100% match. Identical twins. Now he checked several other search results and composed an e-mail to a private investigator, working on the case. (This is a different story and we'll get into it later.) 'Philip', reset the flag, so he would know when the Pats' results came in. With just four weeks till Christmas, it was time to put his surprise plan into action.

 

Tuesday was uneventful until it was time for Scouts. Jim took the older boys. Soon the boys were busy with the meeting, and the parents surrounded Jim. They all wanted to know; what was happening with the school board, what were they planning, were they going to keep all the children out of school, and could anyone join the group. By the end of the meeting there was talk of all the Scouts and their brothers and sisters joining the home school. He told the parents that he would hold an information meeting Friday morning for those interested in joining the new school. Jim felt kind of shell shocked as he drove home.

 

Wednesday classes went well and shortly after lunch, Tom, Leo, Adam and Todd arrived home. It was quite a homecoming. Everyone wanted to see the aids Adam had and Adam was enjoying seeing more and better than ever before. As a matter of fact he could, with his new contacts in, tell the difference between the Pats.

 

Thursday went smoothly until Cub Scouts. Tom and Leo were surrounded just like Jim was on Tuesday. Tempers were much more intense though, as rumors were being spread, that the Scouts knew were simply not true. When the parents that didn't know were told about the meeting the following morning, they pledged to be there. There was one father, who had twins, who was interested, even though he lived in the next county. It seemed he was home schooling his boys and he had been a teacher at one time, but that is a different story, that we'll get into soon enough. It was looking like this whole thing was snowballing. Tom decided they needed to organize even more thoroughly and get some formal rules and regulations put in place.

 

Friday morning the Library was filled to capacity, and maybe slightly beyond capacity. Every Scout and Cub Scout family was represented, in addition, the neighbors of those families, friends and God knows who else. Jim had an information packet for each family and had forms for them to fill out, for each child that they wished to enroll.

 

Tom was awestruck at the enormous turnout. After all the packets were passed out, he stood, and tapped on the table to get everyone's attention. "For those who do not know me, I am Tom Richards. As you know, or will soon find out, I have a big problem with our school system, in this county. I had thought to have my clan home schooled, but as you can see, there are a large number of you that agree with me. What I am proposing is to set up a private school. Although I will be underwriting the school financially, we will be collecting a tuition." There were murmurs throughout the room. "Don't panic, at least not yet, we will accept anyone working within the school, as a waiver for the monetary tuition. An example might be; for each child enrolled, we would ask one day a week of service to the school. This might be anything, including teaching, office work, custodial or kitchen help, whatever you have a talent for, and we will gladly accept it."

 

What followed was an hour and a half of chaos that had parents asking if this or that would count for waivers. There were two parents that asked if there were any teaching positions open. When the excitement calmed down, and Jim had collected the student applications and a form the computer had printed out for tuition waivers. The meeting broke up, with many of the parents asking for copies of the forms for some of their friends. By lunch time, all the parents were gone. Jim went to sort through all the forms and to match skills and children and try to make some sense out of all this.

 

When lunch was served, the dining room was set up with a table which was set apart, for the adults and several long tables in perfect neat rows (not hose or nose) for the kids. Leo was still at the hospital, so Tom figured that he would be eating alone. He settled in, about the time Jim and Ed Hillguard (the new CEO and Patrick's Dad) came and joined him. "Well, Ed, have you been able to get into the corporation?"

 

"Yes, sir. I have a few ideas that may work to streamline some of the paperwork. I need to get into just how the organization works." Ed said, as he began eating his lunch.

 

"Ah, you should spend some time with Alice." Tom suggested.

 

Ed got a funny expression, "Tom, please don't try and match-make."

 

Tom laughed, "Oh, God, no. I don't think Alice is at all interested in a relationship any more than you are. I meant, she is the administrative assistant at the local plant and she knows more about what goes on around here than anyone else I know."

 

"Oh, sorry to jump to conclusions. It just seems that anytime people see a single man with a child, they want to find him a wife and mother for the child," Ed commented.

 

"I've been lucky. Maybe having all the guys I have is enough to convince them of my insanity." They all laughed.

 

"I'll have to see if she can help." Ed said.

 

"Oh, I'm sure she can testify to my insanity." Tom joked.

 

That afternoon Fred Clemets came by to see Tom. "I have some papers for you to sign."

 

"Did I miss a kid? I've got another one?"

 

They laughed until Fred said, "Oh I do have Adam's and David's, thanks for reminding me. Judge Kelper has offered to pre-sign some, so you won't have to wait."

 

"Oh, God, don't let Linda hear that idea, Pleeeeaaaaaassssssseeee!"

 

When they settled down, Fred had Tom sign the complaints against the Chairman of the board of education, the principal of the middle school and the secretary of the intermediate school. These were the civil suits, ones that would really hit home because they would involve money settlements, and the sums asked for were more than enough to hurt. The criminal charges were being handled by the new prosecutor, O. M. Weiner. Fred said there were hate crime charges along with assault and a peppering of slander and liable. The opponents were trying to catch up, but we felt that what ever defense they mustered up would be insufficient. Tom and Fred relished the idea that they would be so totally creamed by the whipping they would receive in court that even the Mayo clinic couldn't help them.

 

Saturday morning, Adam reminded them that 'Philip' had told them there was a gym facility. So soon they were off looking for it. It was just behind the trees, west of the house. 'Philip' opened the doors for them and the kids and adults went exploring. The gym was huge; a full size basketball court (complete with bleachers), the indoor pool was a full Olympic size (currently empty), a weight room, exercise equipment and so much more. A large university would be in envy of this building. 'Philip' had said that there was an ice rink under the floor of the basketball court and there was even a Zamboni ready to run over the ice.

 

There were men and woman's locker rooms. A laundry facility for washing the hundreds of fluffy and absorbent forest green towels with HAVEN embroidered on them in gold. Tom, Leo and Jim agreed that they probably needed to hire a staff to run this facility safely for the kids.

 

Neal was the one to be hungry first and it didn't take long before all the kids realized they were hungry too. After a good lunch, everyone went off on their own. Patty followed Monty into his room.

 

Patty pulled the door closed and pushed in the lock button. She then gave him a kiss and reached down and placed her hand where she could feel him respond. Which he certainly did. "That's nice, Monty."

 

"Thanks." He gently slid his hand until it was over her breast. "That's nice, too."

 

After they had both had a good feel, they sat on the bed. "Now Monty, your birthday is coming up, so what would you really like?"

 

"I've been thinking about that. Well, this is kind of, well, personal." Monty began.

 

"I like it better already." Patty encouraged.

 

"Paaaaatttttttttyyyyyy. This is hard." Of course, Patty totally lost it.

 

Monty stood up and started pacing back and forth. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants. "I want to, ah, ah...thirteen times."

 

"What?"

 

"You know, I want to shoot stuff, once for each year."

 

"Oh, well, Hmmm. Okay, how?"

 

"Jacking off. I don't mean fucking. I don't think either one of us is ready for that."

 

"I agree, but I'm surprised to hear you say that. I thought boys always wanted to fuck."

 

"I'll admit, I think about it a lot, but there are so many things involved in doing that."

 

"So how did you learn all that?"

 

"I was pretty messed up when I got here. Dad was good at explaining things. You know, I had been called a fag for almost three years, and dad said I seemed straight to him. That really got me. Then Neal Jimmy and I all wanted him."

 

"Uncle Tommy?"

 

"Yeah, Dad. Well, he talked to us about how doing something that big would affect everyone else and was not anything to rush. I've thought about what we talked about earlier and, well I think we could probably do some stuff, but not all of it."

 

"So, we got a day. You want to like, look, now. We got to start someplace."

 

"Ah, yeah, I guess. This is weird. I don't know how we should."

 

"Me either. Well, let's start by taking off our shoes and socks. That's safe enough."

 

"Yeah, okay, good."

 

When they were both barefooted, Monty said, "Let's sit on the bed. I want to get to know all about you."

 

They sat on the bed facing each other, and Monty picked up Patty's foot. He examined it and caressed it, then kissed her toes. She didn't have smelly feet like Todd, so he licked her toes.

 

"Oh, Monty, oh. That feels so good."

 

Encouraged, he let her big toe enter his mouth and he sucked and licked it. He wondered if sucking Todd's dick would have been this good. Maybe he should have tried that after all.

 

Patty pulled her foot away and picked up Monty's. She started to caress his foot and he went berserk. He jerked around and laughed.

 

"Oh, God, that tickles, sssshhhhhhhiiiiiiiittttttttttttt."

 

Patty released his foot and mumbled, "Well, that certainly was romantic."

 

"I'm sorry, I didn't know I would react like that."

 

"Yeah. I didn't know I would react like I did either. Okay what next, tops or bottoms?"

 

"Ah, ah, tops."

 

Patty pulled her top off over her head and released and removed her bra.

 

Monty unbuttoned his shirt and soon they were facing each other bare chested. They explored and Patty taught Monty how she liked to be caressed. Finally, it was time and wordlessly they removed their pants.

 

"Oh, Monty. It's wonderful."

 

"Really?" his voice cracked.

 

"Yes. Perfect. It's not a little boy pee pee and it's not huge like that monster; it's just right for you and for me. I hope it's not ticklish." She reached out and explored with her fingers, it wasn't ticklish.

 

Patty released it, after she had had a good feel, and leaned back so Monty could explore. He ran his fingers over her and stroked the hair and was surprised at how soft it felt. "Lower, Monty, lower." He complied and his finger parted her, "Oh, God Monty, yes, yes." She fell back on the bed and spread her legs giving him full access.

 

Monty was fascinated; Patty was panting and moving her hips. He felt a hard thing that wasn't there before and looked closely, "It's a little dick!"

 

"Play with it, rub it, Oh my God, Oh, OH, OOOH MYYYY GGOOOOODDDDDD!" Patty went rigid and then quivered all over, and then she collapsed. Monty recognized an orgasm when he saw one, and grinned.

 

Patty opened her eyes to see her grinning boyfriend. "That never happened to me before."

 

"I'm sorry." Monty said.

 

"No, no, it was great, wonderful, fan-damn-tastic!" She said.

 

Monty grinned even more, "Silly 'Goos', I'm not sorry I gave you one, I sorry you haven't had one before."

 

"I didn't know. If that is what men feel when they shoot I know why they want to all the time. How do I get you to do that?"

 

Monty showed her how Todd and he did it. Patty took over and it didn't take long as excited as he was and the fact that it had been days since he had cum. His first shot hit the underside of his chin and he collapsed back and continued shooting for what seemed to him a year.

 

Patty sat there looking at the cream all over Monty. "Wow, the creep didn't do that much."

 

"I never did before either."

 

"Okay, tomorrow you get to do it thirteen times. I'll help as much as you want."

 

"Deal, kewl."

 

Monty and Patty were occupied so long they didn't even notice the rest of the clan had hijacked Tom to drive them to the mall to buy presents for Monty's Birthday. They returned with the gifts and went into the library and wrapped them. Not the most professional job, but they were covered and would be fun watching Monty try to get through all that tape.

 

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful.

 

At 5:30 the next morning, Patty got up and dressed and quietly went to Monty's room. Monty was lying on his back with his legs spread. Jack was curled up between his knees, and he was tenting the sheet. {Jeez, RR & TSL, Monty not Jack. You guys are sick, that's why I like you so much.} [Hey you led us there Str8mayb it is all your fault :) ]

 

Patty locked the door, stripped and joined Monty under the covers. He was wearing pajama bottoms. The fly was open and his erection was sticking out. Patty gently took it in her hand and began to work it. Monty's eyes flew open, He started to say something but Patty kissed him and he was even more distracted. He moved his arm and realized she was naked. He tried to turn, but Jack had him pretty much pinned down. The feelings were building and as he started to thrust, Jack stood up and gave them both a disgusted glare and jumped down off the bed. Monty Raised his knees and then it hit. He shook and moaned and shot his load. Patty kissed him again and whispered "Happy Birthday. That's one."

 

He hugged her and they drifted into dreamland. The alarm sounded and Monty moved to turn it off and then realized he hadn't set it. The sound was coming from the intercom speaker by his door. Then a voice said, "Neal just woke up and will be coming to get you in about ten minutes."

 

"Jesus H. Christ, I got to go." Patty said and jumped out of bed, dressed and was out the door.

 

Monty was still lying there when Neal came in and tickle attacked him. Pulling the covers back he began his attack, "Happy Birthday, Bro. Get up, the day's awastin'! EEEWWWWWW!!! Monty! You're all covered in..."

 

"Neal, I was already up."

 

"In more ways than one. Jeez, Monty, get a rag or Kleenex or somethin'. Gross, Eeeewwwwww." Neal left as quickly as he came, holding his hands away from his body, whining pitifully, headed quickly for the bathroom.

 

Monty enjoyed a nice warm shower, and cleaned himself real good, Ahhh, that's two.

 

When he returned to his room, Jack was on the bed licking the wet sheets. "Jack, off! Get off. Off the bed." If dogs could smirk, Jack did, as he looked into Monty's eyes, wagged his tail, then jumped down and headed for the doggy door in the kitchen.

 

Breakfast was stacks and stacks of pancakes and link sausage, Monty's favorites. Tom and Daddy Doc both gave Monty a big hug and wished him a happy birthday. After breakfast, most of the kids went outside. Adam stayed behind and went into the library. He had his hand held magnifier and was looking for old journals kept by Philip. He was curious about some things he had heard. He did find a journal dated 1950 - 1954 but nothing earlier. He sat and began to read.

 

Monty and Patty ended up alone in the hayloft of the barn. "Okay, Monty, Lets make a deal for number three." It took longer to get the hay out of their clothes and hair than to do it. Before lunch, they went to the Gazebo and well, number four. They went inside to warm up, they cuddled on the love seat in the den and fed each other the remaining macadamia {OOOOOOOOOO} nuts that were in a bowl on the coffee table.

 

When lunch was served, everyone was around the table when Tom came storming in, "Alright, who ate my nuts!"

 

There was a stunned silence, then a snicker or two (not a Milky Way), Leo said, "I would if you asked nicely." Everyone lost it and it was a good five minutes before order returned.

 

Monty and Patty admitted they had eaten them. Before Tom could respond Leo told him "You of all people, should know not to leave food around with all these hungry eating machines here. Besides, there are plenty more where those came from."

 

Tom glared at Leo, "Yeah, Hawaii."

 

"Yup, want to go?"

 

There was a chorus of yeses around the table. Tom just couldn't stay mad and began laughing.

 

After lunch, the kids went down to the gymnasium. Patty got Monty alone in the weight room and had him lie on the massage table. It took a little more to get ready and a little longer to reach number five.

 

About three they sneaked into the ballroom. As Monty was lowering his pants a loud voice said, 'STOP! Not on my floor! There is a nice old couch up on the stage. A few more stains won't be noticed.'

 

Monty looked around then realized who it was. "Sorry, 'Philip'."

 

'If I don't allow dirty shoes on my floor, I certainly won't allow..."

 

"Okay, we get the point."

 

They decided to go back to Monty's room. It was definitely taking more to get Monty's python excited but they were up to the challenge. Number six.

 

* * * And now for something completely different * * *

 

"Look, we need something that will make them go away. How you managed to call the kids of the richest most powerful man in the county and maybe the state 'lying fagots' is just plain stupid. Don't you know you have to think, at least a little before talking." Defense attorney, Merry Pason, paced in front of her client Walter Fastaff, the current Chairman of the county School Board. "And that dumb ass cousin of yours Sooker, Jesus Christ, The Sheriff told him he was wrong, and he still did what he wanted. The dumb shit."

 

 

Author's Note:

Thank you Radio Rancher for you help with the condiment scene, Monty's ah, gift, Neal's messy hands, and in general egging me on. There was a lot happening in this chapter. And a lot more coming (we're only on six, remember). What is Adam looking for? Will Tom's find his nuts? Will Leo find Tom's nuts? Are Str8mayb and Radio Rancher nuts? Will Neal ever get his hands clean? And will Patty be able to get Monty all the way to thirteen?

By the way Monty's birthday wish is (loosely) based on truth. But that is another story and I don't want to go there again.

 

Editor's Notes:

 

This chapter was a lot of fun to do. There are a lot of silly puns and inside jokes in here, besides the obvious ones. If you haven't heard of The Vestibules, then you might not get some of the references that we have thrown into several chapters, including this one. If you have a sense of humour similar to ours, I recommend therapy, then finding their albums. There is a web page where the reference to Macadamia comes from, a cool website; http://www.ebenezerreformed.com/xstream/bulbousBouffant.php They also have a listing of the words to the skit, and there is a clickable link to listen to it or watch a flash animation. It is a lot of fun. It's even more fun than Tuberculosis. So grab your spatula and keep blubbering and wearing your mukluks.

 

Darryl

AKA Radio Rancher

 

Fort Chief Editor's Notes:

 

Well I think it is time to get out my "Spatula" and flip some "Blubber". Well back to the story; as to the sanity of Str8mayb and The Radio Rancher well the jury is still out on that! This is a very interesting and well thought out chapter the retrospection regarding the characters sexuality was awesome. Neal continues to amaze me with the depth of his care and concern for his brothers. If you would like to know why I am amazed you need to check out "The Compound" at Jeff's Fort Message Board.

 

I wonder how Monty will fare on the morrow?

 

The Story Lover