JC's Hitchhiker

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CHAPTER 11

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"Excuse me?" I asked carefully. 

Josh was grinding my fingers together like a woman in labor, the bones painfully scraping, but he was white as chalk. Justin and Brit, in their matching shirts, wore matching expressions of jaw-dropped surprise. Chris had to actually spit a mouthful of beer onto the ground rather than cough it up. 

And Lance? 

Lance was glaring at me, having risen from his chair. He took a step toward me, and Josh took a step back, but I kept his hand locked in mine. Lance's face was flushed, and his close together eyes drilled into mine. 

"You heard me," he said. "What did you do to my friend? What the hell did you do to him?" 

"What the hell are you doing to him right now?" I snapped back. 

"Lance, dude," Chris said, standing but not moving yet. "You're outta line. Sit back down." 

Lance spun to face him. 

"I'm out of line? I am?" he barked. "You all sit here while Josh tells us this guy turned him into a fucking homo and you all just nod your heads and tell him it's great and I'm the one who's out of line?" 

At the word "homo" Josh made a small, wounded noise behind me. My temper was breaking, and I stepped in front of him, keeping Lance from getting any closer to him. 

"Yeah, you're outta line," Chris said again. "Sit your ass back in your chair, now." 

Britney and Justin stood as well. 

"Maybe everyone should just calm down for a second," Brit began. 

"Jack?" Justin asked. 

"I don't feel like calming down," I said icily. "Exactly what is it you think I've done to Joshua, Lance?" 

Lance inhaled, pulling himself up. 

"Turned him into a faggot, like you," Lance sneered. 

"You son of a bitch!" I yelled, launching myself at him. 

Britney lunged out of the way as Justin and Chris threw themselves in between us, Chris shoving Lance backward in a hockey-style body check and Justin grabbing me and physically holding me in place. 

"I'll kick your fucking ass!" I screamed, trying to break out of Justin's grip. Justin's feet skidded on the sidewalk, but he was still holding me, although he was struggling. 

"Come on, you fucking fairy!" Lance screamed back, as Chris continued shoving him backward. 

"Jack! Don't!" Brit yelled. "Lance! Stop it!" 

"Everyone stop it!" Josh yelled, freezing us all. Tears coursed down his face. "Stop it!" 

None of us moved. Josh was in agony, his face twisted, and then he turned and ran up the stairs toward his apartment. 

"Josh!" I yelled, pulling away from Justin as Josh stumbled on the steps. He pulled himself up and kept running. "Josh! Wait!" 

I slid out of Justin's hands and ran up the steps after Josh. Behind me I heard Lance yell, "Now look what you did!" while Chris yelled, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" I ignored them both, and pushed open the door of the apartment, but didn't see Josh anywhere. 

"Josh?" I asked softly. "Josh, it's Jack. Josh, baby, where are you?" 

He wasn't in the main room, but the bedroom door was open, and I heard him sobbing in there. Crossing quickly to the door, I stepped inside, and he collided with me, clinging to me like a drowning man to a life raft. I wrapped my arms around him and his knees just buckled. Not wanting to drop him, I stepped back, getting us both to a sitting position on the bed, and I just cradled him, holding him tightly. 

Josh was incapable of speaking, his body racked with sobs. He held tightly onto me as I rocked a little back and forth and just tried to soothe him. The front of my shirt was wet as he pressed his face into my chest. I ran a hand through his hair, stroking his head, and made whispering "Shhhhh." sounds, just trying to get him to slow down his breathing. His chest hitched, and I thought maybe he was trying to say my name. 

"Josh, shhhh," I whispered. "It'll be ok, Josh." 

My only answer was more sobbing. Sensing movement in the doorway, I looked up, and saw Justin standing in the living room, his face twisted with concern. He looked at me quizzically, as if to ask if he could do anything, and I waved him away, quickly. I didn't know how many people Josh wanted to see him like that. I realized when I looked up at Justin that I was crying, as well, and I had to blink a few times to see him clearly. Justin retreated to the living room. 

Josh kept crying, and I kept soothing him. Eventually his tears leveled off, and I realized that he was falling asleep. Carefully I pulled him up the bed, and eased him onto a pillow. He was still whimpering in his sleep, and I felt my hands clench into fists. 

"Is he ok?" Justin whispered from behind me. 

"No, he's not, but I think he's asleep," I said, taking Justin's arm and leading him into the living room. 

"Are you ok?" Justin whispered. 

We were face to face, only inches between us. I hadn't even been aware of the proximity until Justin swiped his thumb over my cheek, flicking a tear away. 

"You're crying," he whispered. 

"I need air," I said, stepping away from him. I had to look up to see into Justin's eyes, as he was slightly taller than me. "Justin, he trusts you. Can you stay here, in case he wakes up?" 

"Sure, go catch your breath, " he said. 

"Thanks," I said, wiping at my own eyes again. 

Suddenly I felt Justin's arms around me, as he pulled me against him tightly. 

"It'll be ok, Jack," he said, his breath hot on my ear, his lips scraping against my cheek as he said it. 

"I know," I said, quickly pulling away. 

As I walked out the front door I glanced back, and saw Justin pull one of the dining room chairs into a corner of the bedroom, so that he could watch Josh. They really still were best friends, and Josh was in good hands. I walked out, and sat at the top of the steps, looking up at the sky, and then put my head in my hands. I heard someone begin climbing the staircase, and looked up to see Chris walking toward me. He sat down next to me, and I shoved over a little to give him some room. 

"Hey," he said. "You ok, Jack?" 

"I've been better," I said, not looking at him. "I'd kill for a cigarette." 

"You smoke?" he asked, not looking at me, either. 

"I quit," I answered. "Twice." 

He reached into a pocket of his cargo shorts, and removed a pack of cigarettes. Shaking two out, he handed me one and popped the other into his mouth before lighting us both. 

"You smoke?" I asked, taking a long, slow inhale. It seemed obvious that he must, but I was surprised. 

"Not officially, no," he answered, laughing. 

"I see," I said, laughing along with him. Smoking did not convey a wholesome image. "Where is everyone?" 

"Brit cleaned up the barbecue," Chris said, exhaling a large cloud. "I think right now she's in Justin's apartment putting things in storage containers. I even saw her before looking at the grill, like she might scrub it." 

"Her? Scrub a grill?" I blurted, trying to reconcile the image in my head. 

Chris laughed. 

"She has this domestic streak," he said, chuckling. "Lance is in his apartment, probably praying for all of you." 

"What?" I asked, turning to look at him. 

"You heard me," Chris said. "He's probably in there on his knees by the bed, right now." 

"Praying for our souls?" I asked dubiously. 

"Not yours, I'm sure," Chris said. "He's probably praying for JC, though. You guys scared the hell out of him tonight." 

"I didn't realize Lance was so religious," I said. 

"It's where he goes for comfort, and I think Lance is feeling pretty threatened right now," Chris said. "Lance isn't quite like the rest of us. We're a family, but Lance has always been the one who focused on us being a business, too. When we were first getting started, he handled a lot of stuff with the management. Bookings, travel, hotels, all of that was Lance. Even now, when other people handle stuff like that, he's the one who sets up wake up calls with the hotels, and makes sure breakfast is there in the morning." 

"But I'm not a threat to any of that," I said. 

"Yes, you are, to Lance," Chris said, adding the last part quickly as I glared at him. "One of the band being gay would affect the whole band if it came out." 

"But he's only out to you guys," I said, shaking my head. 

"For now," Chris said. "But the future? Who knows. And from Lance's point of view you really did take his friend away." 

"But Josh still wants to be friends with all of you," I said. I didn't really understand any of this, but Chris seemed to get all of it. 

"And Lance still wants to be friends with JC, I'm sure, but that's the problem," Chris explained. "JC probably didn't mention this to you, but we've had some strain lately. That's why we've been taking so many breaks, and why we're living together right now. We're trying to patch things over, and try to remember that we all like each other." 

"What kind of strain?" I asked, curious for anything that might explain this. 

"Well, there's the way JC has been acting for a while," Chris began. "But we've been all over that. Lance has also been on the outs with Justin for a while, too. The whole premarital sex thing between him and Brit is a big problem for Lance." 

"And the rest of you are virgins?" I asked innocently. 

"Oh, hell no," Chris answered, snickering. "But with those two it's continuous and obvious, and Lance is offended. Now he's got something even bigger to be offended about." 

"Great," I said, throwing up my hands. "Now what do we do?" 

"I'm not really sure," Chris said, destroying my idea of him as an all-knowing boy band sage. "JC and Lance will have to work this out themselves. In the meantime, I think you and Lance should probably give each other a wide berth. I told him the same thing." 

I shook my head. 

"How are they supposed to work it out for themselves?" I asked. "Lance doesn't really seem like he's interested in talking, and Josh is upstairs sleeping because he cried until he passed out." 

"Lance will come around," Chris said. "At least enough to keep things between him and JC civil, because, like I said, they're friends. You, though, I don't think he's ever going to like. He blames you for the pain this is causing him." 

"Causing him? Him?" I barked, standing. "What about Josh? He hasn't even been able to talk he was crying so hard, and how do you think that makes me feel? Am I supposed to be sorry Lance feels offended when Josh is upstairs whimpering in his sleep?" 

"Jack," Chris said, standing. 

"I'm sorry," I said, depositing my cigarette in one of the potted plants. "I'm sorry. It's not you I'm mad at, and I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm gonna go check on Josh. Thanks for the cigarette." 

"Anytime," Chris said, lighting a second one. 

The apartment was dark when I opened the door. Justin hadn't turned on any of the lights, which, I assumed, meant he hadn't moved from the chair the entire time I'd been gone. I didn't hear any noise, so I was a little startled by Justin's voice. 

"Jack?" he asked softly. 

"Yeah, it's me," I said, stepping into the bedroom. 

It was almost pitch black in here, but I could just barely make out Josh, curled on his side on the bed, where I'd left him. I didn't see Justin, and I jumped when he put his hand on my shoulder. 

"You ok now?" he asked, sniffing loudly. "I smell you've been talking to Chris." 

"Yeah, I'm fine," I answered. "Did he wake up?" 

"No," Justin said. "He stopped that whimpering noise a while ago, though. I'm gonna fucking kill Lance." 

"No, Justin, don't do that," I whispered. The whole conversation had been a string of hisses and whispers, as neither one of us wanted to wake Josh. "Chris thinks we should let the two of them talk it out. So do I, actually." 

"You sure?" Justin asked. He could be surprisingly verbose in the absence of Britney. 

"I think so," I answered unsurely. "Thanks for staying here with him." 

"Any time, bro," Justin said, giving me another quick hug. "Goodnight." 

"Good night," I answered. 

After Justin left I quickly stripped down to my boxers, and then began to carefully remove Josh's shoes. He stirred a little, and sat up, but still seemed mostly asleep. 

"Jack?" he asked quietly. 

"Shhhh, baby," I answered, stroking his face. "I'm right here. Let's get you undressed for bed, ok?" 

"Yeah, ok," he answered. 

Josh helped me to pull off his clothes by raising his arms, and lifting his hips when I needed to pull of his pants, but mostly he just sat there, almost as if he was in a trance. When I had him stripped down, I pulled back the covers and pushed him gently onto the bed, and then I walked around to the other side and climbed in. I thought he'd spoon against me, since we usually slept with one of us spooned on the other, but he surprised me, rolling over and laying his head on my chest. His arms wrapped around me, and I quickly cradled him in mine. 

"I love you, Jack," he whispered. His voice quavered, but he wasn't crying again, which I thought was probably a sign of improvement. 

"I love you, too, Josh," I said, feeling him tremble. 

"I thought Lance was my friend," Josh said, his voice cracking. "I thought he was my friend. Did you hear what he said?" 

"Shhh, Josh, they're just words," I said. My heart was breaking to hear him like this. Maybe I'd help Justin kill Lance after all. "Lance is your friend. He's just scared and confused." 

"But Jack," Josh began, and I kissed his forehead. 

"Josh, maybe this will all look better in the morning," I said. "You're too upset to think clearly about this right now. Why don't we just get some sleep, and look at this again tomorrow?" 

"That's a good idea," Josh said, sighing against my chest. "I love you." 

"I love you, too," I answered. "Everything's going to be ok." 

As Josh finally fell asleep, I hoped that I was right, and that everything would be ok. I lay in the bed staring at the ceiling, listening to the overall silence of the building. I couldn't hear any cars on the road outside, and Justin and Britney were apparently not in the mood this evening. Josh nuzzled closer to me in his sleep, his hair brushing my chin, his warm cheek scraping over my chest, his head rising and falling with my breathing. I looked down at his face, watching his eyes dance behind his eyelids, and hoped again that everything would be ok, and that I'd be able to keep him from getting hurt again. 

When I woke up in the morning, I didn't feel Josh's warm weight on my chest anymore. Groggily I rolled to the side, throwing an arm out for him, but my hand fell on empty bed. Looking up, although it was still pretty dark, I realized he wasn't anywhere in the bedroom. I listened carefully, thinking that maybe he had gone to the bathroom, but heard nothing, so I slid quickly out of bed. Crossing toward the door, I immediately collided with the chair that Justin had pulled in last night. Cursing softly, I pushed it all the way back into the corner, where neither of us would run into it. 

"Josh?" I called softly. 

He didn't answer. A quick glance at the clock on the nightstand told me that it was just after five in the morning. Where the hell could he be at that hour? Not in the living room. It was empty as well. He wasn't getting a drink in the kitchen area, either, and the bathroom was also empty. I took a quick pit stop there to pee, and then poked my head into the door to the other bedroom. 

Josh had his back to me, his smooth shoulders glinting in the light of the one lamp that hung over the keyboard. His bright white boxer briefs gleamed under the lamp, stretching over his things and the glimpse of his cotton-covered ass that I could see through the space between the chair back and the seat. He had his earphones on, and his head was bobbing lazily to music that I couldn't hear, as his whole body moved slowly back and forth on the chair swaying along. His arms were flexing and twisting, the veins in his forearms standing out, as he pounded the keys. His head swung to the side, and I saw that his eyes were closed, but his fingers flew with passionate skill over the keys. 

I thought about going over, touching him, letting him know I was there, but realized that he was in his own space right now, dealing with things in his own way. Josh poured himself into his music, and was now obviously using it to help him sort through whatever was going on. Sleepy, yawning, I went back to bed, sliding between sheets that had not yet had time to get cold. 

I was awakened some time later when Josh climbed carefully back onto the bed, obviously trying not to wake me. 

"Hey," I said, holding out an arm as he slid over to me. 

Josh draped an arm over my chest, his skin warm against mine. He leaned in and kissed me, his lips seeking mine as our chins scraped roughly over each other, my morning stubble bristling through the strip of his goatee. His bare chest pressed against mine, and I felt his nipples sliding over the slope of my pecs as his tongue darted swiftly in and out of my mouth, snakelike. He pulled back, and I lost myself for a second in his eyes, seeing my own reflected back at me. 

"Hey," he whispered. 

He leaned forward, kissing me again, and caught my lower lip in his teeth. Pulling back, he stretched it a little before letting go and leaning in to kiss again and repeat. 

"Feel better?" I asked, brushing a stray lock of his hair out of his eyes. 

"Lots better," he answered, kissing me again. "Want to see how good I feel?" 

"Love to," I replied, as his hand slid down under the sheet. 

I wasn't sure what his hand was doing, as he wasn't touching me with it, but then I felt him shifting on the bed a little, and his hand reappeared, clutching his snowy white boxer briefs. He flung them off to the side, where they hit the wall and fell to the floor. Josh dropped his hands to my shoulders, pulling himself onto me, and just draping his body over mine, face to face, our noses rubbing before he leaned down to kiss me again. His nipples, now hard, bored into my chest, and my breathing unconsciously matched the rhythm of his as our abs flexed against each other. Lower, I could feel his cock pressing against mine, throbbing through the thin fabric of my boxers. 

His weight crushed me into the bed, but it was a sexual pressure, and I loved the feeling of the full body contact, the warmth of his skin sliding against mine, my whole body on fire. It was like he was touching me in a thousand different places at once, and he flexed against me again, nipping at my jawbone, tugging at my ear with his teeth. 

"I'm feeling a lot better," he purred, kissing me again and again. 

"I see that," I sighed, surrendering myself to his tongue and his roaming hands, which slid over my chest, up and down my neck, through my hair, turning my head from side to side so he could reach any part of my skin that struck his fancy. 

He giggled, disappearing under the covers, his body sliding over mine. I couldn't see him, as he was completely under the sheet, a featureless shape moving lower and lower on the bed. I felt his nose brush past my navel, and then felt his fingers sliding under the waistband of my boxers, tugging at them. I lifted my ass, and they slid off, his hands following them down my legs, caressing my thighs and calves before he practically jumped back up the bed, his head bursting from under the sheet. His mouth fell onto mine again as his body crashed on top of me, forcing the breath from my lungs in a whoop of laughter. He threw my boxers off to the side, too, and they joined his boxer briefs on the same part of the floor. 

"What's gotten into you?" I asked, amused by his playfulness. 

"Nothing," he said. "I love you. That's all." 

"I love you, too," I answered, rolling. 

I was now on top of him, my hard cock sliding over his, my firm body pressing against his smooth, sleekly muscled form. Our hands roamed over each other as our tongues dueled in each other's mouths, the two of us no longer laughing, caught up in the urgency of our need as we moved against each other. Josh scraped his fingers exquisitely down my back, and I arched into him, my cock pressing against his, both of us leaking and dripping, sliding and gliding and throbbing against each other. 

We rolled again, the sheet wrapping around us, so that he was on top of me again. Our cocks continued to grind against each other, the heads brushing, the ridges on our crowns catching, as we continued trying to consume each other's mouths. My hands slid up and down Josh's back, pressing and pulling, as he began to grind his pelvis against mine in earnest. Both of us were flexing, and sighing, pushing against each other, trying to meld our bodies, pressing ourselves into each other. Josh groaned into my mouth as I grabbed the bag of his head with one hand, pushing his head forcefully against mine, smashing our lips roughly between both our teeth. Josh's hands continued to slide up and down my body, stopping here to twist a nipple, or there just to caress or massage, and my other hand followed his spine down to his ass, grabbing one of his cheeks and squeezing it as hard as I could as he groaned again and shot his cum all over our bellies. 

As he groaned my name, his hips jerking against me, Josh tugged on my earlobe again with his teeth as his fingers found one of my nipples and squeezed, hard. I felt my own hips jerking as my cum joined his, gluing us together. I felt his cock throbbing, right against mine, felt every jerk and surge as we both pumped ourselves dry. I gently took hold of his head and pulled it up, so that he was looking down at me, his panting mouth open, his eyes heavy lidded, and his face flushed. 

"Tell me again that you love me," I whispered, kissing him. 

"I love you, Jack," he answered, laying his head back down. "I love you." 

"Good," I said, holding him. "Because I love you, too." 

We lay there for several minutes before Josh chuckled softly against my neck. 

"What's so funny?" I asked. 

"Nothing," he answered. "I'm just thinking that we should get in the shower. If this stuff dries, it's going to rip out our hair when I try to get off you." 

"That's why I love you," I said, laughing. "You're so eloquent and charming, so cultured and refined." 

"So naked, so slimed with cum," he added, lifting himself off of me. 

I followed him to the bathroom, and together we climbed into the shower. Josh was still in that playful mood, and there was a lot of horsing around in the shower. Somehow we ended up ripping half of the curtain down, although neither of us could explain how, and we collapsed in giggles, oblivious to the water spraying all over the bathroom. We ended up having to go to the linen closet for towels, as the ones in the bathroom were soaked. 

"Should we mop it up?" I asked. 

"We could just leave the windows open, and let it evaporate," Josh suggested. 

"Good idea," I said, ruffling his hair with a towel. "What are we going to do today?" 

Josh took a deep breath. 

"I'm going to go talk to Lance," he answered. 

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CHAPTER 12

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"OK," I said, shrugging. "Are you sure you're up for that?" 

"I think I am," Josh said, sitting down on the bed. "I thought about it last night, and I think I really should sit down, and just try to explain some of this to him. I mean, he is my friend and all, and I just kind of want him to understand." 

"I think that's a good idea, " I said, sitting next to him. Josh took my hand almost automatically. "But what if he doesn't understand? Or doesn't want to?" 

I was thinking of last night, and was worried that Josh might come back to the apartment hurt again. If he did, I wasn't sure anything would be able to stop me from going downstairs and beating Lance into a bloody pulp. I mean, sure, he was surprised yesterday, and a little upset, but he'd been almost deliberately hurtful, and I wasn't sure I wanted Josh exposed to that again. 

"If he doesn't, he doesn't," Josh said. "But he's my friend, and I can't just write him off without trying to work this out. Besides, I think yesterday he was just surprised, and that's why he got so upset. Maybe if it's just me and him, he'll be a little calmer." 

"Maybe," I agreed. Maybe he actually would be. Maybe winged monkeys might fly out of my ass. 

The two of us got dressed, throwing on some casual clothes, and then had a quick breakfast after Josh finally showed me how to operate the coffee machine. I fidgeted nervously, but tried not to show it, as Josh pulled his shoes on, and then I gave him a quick hug, trying to infuse him with some of my warmth before he left. 

"I love you," I said. "And I'll wait right here until you get back." 

"I love you, too," Josh said. His voice quavered a little, but on the whole he sounded pretty sure of himself. 

Josh gave me another hug, and then left the apartment. I sat down at the table with my coffee, and started to wait. I was going to read some more, but couldn't seem to focus on my book, and I began to pace the apartment instead. Realizing what I was doing, I went into the bedroom and made the bed. Then I mopped the bathroom after all, and bundled up all of the wet towels and the bathmats to take to the laundry room. After that I washed up the cereal bowls from breakfast, and was just pouring another cup of coffee when I heard a knock on the door. 

Maybe Josh had forgotten his key? Had he even locked the door? I hurried over as these and a hundred other questions raced through my mind, wondering if I'd be spending another day hugging my sobbing boyfriend, or if maybe I'd spend it down the street at the county lockup facing assault charges. My pulse racing, I jerked the door open so fast that Justin jumped back, colliding with the walkway railing. For a second I was afraid he might pitch over the side. 

"Jack! You scared me," Justin said, grabbing the railing. "What the hell are you doing?" 

"What are you doing?" I blurted. "I'm sorry, I mean, what are you doing here?" 

"Can I come in?" he asked, hands on his hips. 

Justin was wearing a tight white tanktop undershirt, so thin I could see his rosy pink nipples through it as it clung to every ripple and bulge of his torso. It was riding up just a little at his waist, flashing the smallest sliver of his tanned, flat stomach above the baggy khaki pants that were hanging so loosely on his hips they looked as if they might fall at any second. They were loose enough to cover everything, but touched him in just enough places to offer a suggestion of what might be underneath. 

"Sure," I said, pulling the door open wider, shaking myself from the remembrance of seeing exactly what was under those pants yesterday. "What can I do for you, Justin?" 

"I was thinking last night, and I wanted to talk to you guys," he said, brushing past me. He slumped onto the couch, arms thrown back, legs wide. "Is Josh up yet?" 

"He went to talk to Lance," I said, sitting down across from him. 

"Oh, wow," Justin said, sitting up and leaning toward me. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" 

"It's Josh's idea, so I hope it works," I said, sipping my coffee. "I hope he's ok." 

"Are you ok?" Justin asked, staring unblinking into my eyes. "Do you need a hug?" 

"I'm fine," I said, leaning back, puzzled over the offer of a hug. "Where's Brit?" 

Justin sighed, and settled back into the couch, golden tufts of hair peeking out from beneath his widely flung arms. 

"We're kind of fighting right now," Justin said, looking down. 

"Is it bad?" I asked. They had seemed so happy yesterday. I realized suddenly that it might not be my place to ask. "Is that what you needed to talk to Josh about? Because I'm sure he'll be back soon." 

"No, it wasn't that," Justin sighed. "And it's nothing really bad. Just a lot of little stuff. We'll be ok." 

"Do you want some coffee or something?" I asked, not sure of what else I should do. 

"No, I'm good, thanks," Justin answered, staring at me. "Since Josh isn't here, maybe, would you mind if I, you know, talked to you?" 

"Not at all, Justin," I answered. Was it me, or did he seem nervous? "What's up?" 

"I was thinking about what Josh said yesterday, about, you know, you and him," Justin began, leaning forward. "Jack, how did you know you were gay?" 

"That's an interesting question, Justin," I said, sipping my coffee again. "Why do you ask?" 

"Oh, well, you know," he began, running his hands over his stubbly blond hair. His shirt pulled up a little, and I glanced away from his golden treasure trail, snaking down into his pants, my eyes flicking back up to his face. "I was thinking about what Josh said, about how he was trying to figure stuff out. How did you figure it out?" 

"Well, I guess I always knew I was different," I said, watching him. He was leaning forward, elbows on knees, propping his head up on his hands. I had his full attention. "I always found myself looking at guys, and wanting to be friends with them, and thinking about them. Then when I was in high school I kind of realized exactly how I was different, and what it all meant." 

"Did you, you know, did you date anyone in high school?" he asked, eyes wide. 

"Not exactly," I said, trying to figure out exactly why he was asking. Did he just want to understand what was going on with Josh and I better, or was there more? "I had this guy friend, and we kind of fooled around a little, but we never, you know, called each other boyfriends or anything. When I went to college, I picked one kind of far from my hometown, and I just decided to come out." 

"Weren't you scared?" Justin asked, leaning forward. 

"A lot, actually," I answered. "But college isn't really like high school. It's a whole different world, and your family isn't around. Everybody's trying all kinds of things, so it seemed like the right kind of place to try being myself." 

"What happened?" Justin asked. "What did people say?" 

"Well, I went through two roommates before I got one who was ok with it," I said. "The first couple didn't want to live with me, because they were worried I was going to hit on them, or something, but then this guy was assigned to me who really didn't care either way." 

"Was he gay, too?" Justin asked. 

"Actually, no," I answered. "He had about ten different girlfriends, but he was a nice guy, and the way he saw it I was nice, I was clean, and I wasn't competition. We had a lot in common otherwise, and got along really well, and we ended up living together all four years we were there." 

"That's cool," Justin said. 

"I guess," I agreed. "Not everyone was that nice, though. Lots of people said things, and people used to write stuff on our door. Once I even got beat up by some guys on the football team." 

"Did they get in a lot of trouble?" Justin asked, leaning forward again. 

"Not really," I said. Justin's eyebrows popped up, and I sighed. "I didn't turn them in." 

"What? Why didn't you turn them in?" Justin asked, confused. I could tell that he was also kind of angry. "Nobody deserves to get beat up!" 

"But I thought I did," I sighed, looking down. I set my coffee cup down, and Justin took one of my hands. 

"What do you mean?" he asked. "Jack?" 

"I'm sorry, Justin," I said, starting to stand. "You don't want to hear any of this." 

Justin pushed me firmly back down into my chair, not letting go of my hand. 

"Yes, I do," he said. "Josh is my friend, and you're my friend, and if somebody hurt you I want to hear about it." 

And looking at Justin, seeing the concern in his eyes lined on his face, I discovered that I wanted to tell. 

"The guys who beat me up ended up breaking my arm and cracking a couple of my ribs," I said, still looking down. I didn't want to look Justin in the eyes. I didn't want to look anyone in the eyes while I told this story. "My roommate took me to the emergency room, and when my parents got the bill, I lied and told them I had fallen down the stairs. The guys who beat me up never got in any trouble, because I never reported them." 

Justin now had my hand held between both of his. 

"But Jack, why not?" he asked quietly. 

"I didn't report it because I thought I deserved it," I admitted quietly. "I thought that I deserved it because of who I was." 

Justin sighed, squeezing my hand comfortingly. 

"I don't understand," he said. "I thought you said you were out." 

"I thought I was, but the night those guys beat me up, I realized that I still didn't really know who I was," I explained. "I was out to everyone at school, but not to anyone at home, or to my family. I was still kind of ashamed of who I was, and I tried to hide it by being as gay as I could be on campus. I joined all the groups, I had pink triangles and rainbow stickers all over everything I owned, and all I ever talked about was about how great it was to be gay. And it was all because that was who I thought I was supposed to be." 

"And then?" he asked. 

"And then one night I was leaving a bar," I said. "I'd been out with friends, and decided I wanted to go home early, and these guys stopped me in an alley, and started calling me names. And because I was all out and loud and proud, I started yelling right back at them, and I got the shit beat out of me. And afterward, I realized that those guys didn't even beat me up for the right reasons. They didn't know me, or anything about me, except that I was gay, because that's all I told anyone. So I decided to change." 

"You started dating girls again?" Justin asked, baffled. 

"No, Jesus, no," I answered, smiling. "I took down all my stickers, I stopped going to meetings, and I spent a long time figuring out who I was, and who I wanted to be. I came out to my family, and I went on with my life." 

I hadn't realized that a tear had fallen down my cheek until Justin reached out and wiped it carefully away with one of his fingers. I looked up, and his dark blue eyes, so much darker than Josh's, were staring into mine, and they were wet, as if tears were standing in them. His finger slid across my cheek, just under my eye, feather light, and I jumped up out of my chair. Justin stood with me and wrapped me in a hug, both of his arms circling around my back and crushing me against him. 

"I'm so sorry for you Jack," he whispered, his hands sliding over my shoulder blades. "I'm sorry you had to go through that." 

I pushed him away, my hands on his strong, smooth arms, sliding over his tanned velvet skin. 

"It's ok, Justin," I said, staring at him, aware of how close our faces were to each other. "It was a long time ago. I'm better now. I know who I am." 

He stared at me, not blinking, mouth open, pink lips parted as if he was going to say something, and I shook my head, as if to clear it. 

"Do you, um, do you want to stay for lunch?" I asked, stepping away from him. 

"Yeah, sure," he said, blinking quickly. "Do you, uh, do you need any help?" 

"I was just going to make sandwiches," I said, turning toward the refrigerator. "I thought I'd just put the stuff out, and we could make our own." 

"Yeah, that'll be good," he said, stepping past me. "I'll get plates." 

What the hell was going on? What had almost just happened? Had I really just been standing there in Justin's arms? Justin's? Had we actually been face to face, only inches apart? I could have sworn we were almost about to kiss, but was that something I wanted? Was it something he wanted? Or was he just trying to comfort me? My inner musings were interrupted when Josh walked in. I rushed over to him and hugged him fiercely, pulling him against me, and he hugged me back with equal enthusiasm, burying his face under my chin. 

"Josh," I said, holding on. We were kind of rocking back and forth. 

"Hey Jack," he murmured into my neck. He lifted his head up, and I kissed him. 

"You ok?" I asked. He kissed me again. 

"Yeah, yeah, I'm ok," he answered, still holding tightly to me. "I love you so much." 

"I love you, too," I said. "Did you talk to Lance?" 

"Yeah, I did," Josh sighed. 

"Did it go ok?" Justin asked, stepping up next to us. 

Josh looked at him quizzically, and didn't let go of me. 

"Justin came up for lunch," I explained, leaving out the rest. "How did it go?" 

"Not bad, but not great," Josh said, leading me over to the couch. We sat, holding hands, and Justin sat in the chair. "He's still not ok with it, but he isn't yelling anymore. He thinks I'm just confused, but at least he'll talk to me now." 

"Did you try to explain how you feel?" I asked. "All the stuff we talked about?" 

"I did, and he listened, but I don't think he really wanted to," Josh said. "He went on for a while about God, and how it's a sin, and stuff like that." 

I sighed. I'd heard that too many times before. 

"Are you still friends?" Justin asked. 

"I think so," Josh answered. "He's just really confused. And I'm kind of beat. Maybe we should have lunch now." 

We had a simple lunch of sandwiches and some fruit, and didn't really talk. Josh asked where Brit was, and Justin explained again that they were kind of fighting, but that it wasn't that important, and that they'd be ok. Josh asked me what I wanted to do today, since we had kind of stayed in so far, and I said that I'd be happy doing whatever he wanted to do. 

"Why don't we go clubbing?" Justin suggested. "We haven't gone out in a while, and we can invite Chris and Lance, too." 

"I'd love to go clubbing," I said. "What should I wear?" 

The two of them looked at each other, and then looked me over. 

"Let's go look at your clothes," Josh suggested. 

The two of them looked through the clothes I had hung in the closet. 

"Hmmm," Justin hummed, frowning thoughtfully. "Maybe something a little less, you know, khaki." 

"What's wrong with khaki?" I asked. "I like khaki." 

"And I like you in khaki," Josh said, hugging me. "Remember when you said you wanted to see the Beverly Center?" 

"Yeah," I answered warily. 

"You need some clubbing clothes," he said. "We're going shopping!" 

He and Justin high-fived, and I wondered what on earth I was in for. Justin ran downstairs to put a different shirt on, and to invite Brit, and we agreed to meet at the parking lot. 

"So what was Justin doing up here?" Josh asked, as we gathered up our wallets and keys. 

"He wanted to talk to you, but then decided to talk to me instead," I explained, following Josh out the front door. 

"Everything ok?" Josh asked, locking up. 

"Yeah, he just wanted to know a little more about, you know, being gay," I explained. "I think he's still trying to understand where you're coming from." 

"Did you help him out?" Josh asked, smiling innocently. 

"Yeah, I think so," I answered. 

When we got to the parking lot, Justin was there alone, having pulled a shirt over the one he already had on. He explained that Britney would go with us later, but didn't feel like shopping right now. After a quick discussion we decided to take Justin's car, which could hold the three of us, and Josh cautioned me to be sure to buckle my seat belt. Once we peeled out of the parking lot, barely making it past the gate before it could even fully open, I understood why. 

"Jesus, Justin, did you just learn to drive yesterday?" I asked, clinging to the door handle for dear life. 

"No, why?" he asked innocently, cutting off a bus and sliding across three lanes without signaling or checking a mirror. 

"No reason," I hissed, rigid. 

When we finally got there, and parked the car, Josh and Justin pulled on their disguises of hats and glasses, Josh carefully tucking all of his hair under the hat. I asked why they weren't wearing anything more elaborate, or why we weren't just going shopping as ourselves and bringing bodyguards, and Josh explained that the best disguise was usually the simplest one. People don't really expect to see a famous person, even in L.A., and they won't look twice at someone who just kind of looks like one. The three of us started out by just walking up and down the mall. At any store where I glanced inside, or stopped to look in the window, Josh and Justin pulled me inside, and began to look the racks over, but it became tragically obvious at some point that I just wasn't comfortable picking out anything for myself that the two of them considered appropriate to go clubbing in. 

"Don't you want to buy anything, you know, sexy?" Josh asked, as the two of them frowned at the clothes in my hands. The expressions on their faces were pricelessly identical. 

"I'm not sexy?" I asked. "You haven't complained before." 

"I didn't say that!" Josh said, backpeddling quickly. "You're plenty sexy, Jack." 

"Yeah, you're cute, but your taste in clothes is really, you know, preppy," Justin said. 

"Josh, I just can't do this!" I said, throwing down the clothes in exasperation. I immediately picked them up again, not wanting the salespeople to get upset. "I'm no good at picking out clothes like these. I don't know what goes with what, and none of this looks good on me." 

"A lot of it looks good on you," Justin said. 

"You're just not used to it, " Josh added, seeming not to notice that his best friend had complimented his boyfriend twice in under a minute. Josh put one arm around my shoulders, buddy style, and led me back to another rack. "Let's put these back, and look around some more." 

"Josh, do you remember the first weekend we met?" I asked. "When I had to borrow clothes from you?" 

"Yeah, I remember that," he said, blushing and grinning as he remembered the rest of it. "You looked hot in my stuff." 

"Yeah, but you picked it out, " I said. "Josh, just tell me what to buy, ok? I trust your judgment, and I have no sense for this kind of fashion." 

We watched as Justin picked out some sort of fringed denim and leather jacket for himself, and I winced. 

"I'll pick out the clothes, and Justin can help, but you're not paying," Josh said. "This is my treat." 

"Josh, I have money," I said. "I thought we talked about this already." 

"We did, but Jack, I have more money than I'll ever spend on myself," he said. "I want to spend some on you. It makes me happy. Humor me, ok?" 

"OK," I said, shrugging. 

The next few hours passed in a whirl as I obediently followed them from store to store, trying on whatever they handed me. Frequently one or both would follow me into the dressing room, ducking in and out to grab something else, or to carry a shirt that they agreed on and that I liked around the store to find something that went with it. We began to accumulate a stack of bags as they purchased things for me and for themselves, as we ran from shoe stores to jewelry stores to hat stores to clothing stores of every style. 

I was in a changing room, about to peel myself out of a pair of fringed black leather pants, when Justin pushed into the tiny closet, four or five shirts draped over his arm. 

"Don't take the pants off yet!" he ordered. "Try these on first." 

"OK, OK," I said, pulling my shirt off. I got tangled in the sleeves somehow, and felt Justin's hands brush over my sides as he grabbed the bottom of my shirt. 

"Let me help with that," he said, tugging it off over my head. 

I was now facing Justin, bare-chested, as he stood less than a foot from me, with my shirt in his hands. The dressing room was cold, and my nipples were both painfully pointed. Justin held a shirt out to me. 

"Try this one first," he said, glancing at my chest and then back up at me. 

"Thanks," I said, aware of the close proximity. 

I could almost feel his breath on me in the tiny space, and could smell his body wash and cologne, a musky yet still clean smell. 

"Where's Josh?" I asked, shrugging the shirt on. I turned to face the mirror. 

"He wanted to look at some belts," Justin answered, looking over my shoulder. "Here, try this one." 

He handed me another shirt, and I pulled off the other one and handed it over my shoulder without turning around. In the mirror, Justin watched me, and I watched him, neither of us saying a word or trying to hide it. I tried on the shirt and shrugged. 

"I kind of like it," I said, looking at it in the mirror. Justin's reflection grinned behind me. 

"We'll put that one on the keep pile, then," he said, handing me another. 

I slid into the last one, and buttoned it up. 

"I don't know," I said, turning from side to side. "I don't think it looks good on me." 

"Try undoing some of the buttons," Justin said. 

He leaned over, now right behind me, and I felt his fingers brush over my collarbone as he undid the top button. Sliding lower, his fingertips traced a line down my chest as he undid the next button. I watched him, in the mirror, as he looked down over my shoulder, his eyes following the line his fingers had drawn on my body. His hand slid away. 

"See? It looks good now," he said, staring at my eyes in the mirror. 

"I guess," I agreed. Actually, I looked pretty sexy. 

Justin's hands reappeared in the mirror, crawling quickly down my torso as he undid all of the buttons. 

"I can get those," I said, not really moving to. 

"No problem," he said. I felt the fingertips of both his hands, soft and warm, brush quickly against my abs as he curled them around the edges of the shirt and pulled it off me. "We'll put this one on the keep pile, too." 

"Justin," I began, staring into his eyes as he stared at me in the mirror, his face over my shoulder a little flushed, his mouth open. I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. "Justin, we need to talk." 

"About what?" he asked, swallowing nervously. 

He stepped away, and I turned around, aware again that I was only half dressed, that we were right next to each other, and that he had just undressed me without being asked. 

"About whatever's going on with you," I said, watching his face go blank. "I know you saw me and Josh the other night, Justin." 

He didn't say anything, just swallowed once, and he kept looking at me, unable to break eye contact. 

"So why didn't you say anything?" I asked. 

Justin swallowed again, and his tongue flicked out to wet his lips. His mouth opened as if he was going to say something, and then Josh opened the door to the dressing stall. 

"Say anything about what?" Josh asked, looking from me to Justin and back again. 

---

CHAPTER 13

---

"About how these pants make me look like one of the Village People," I said, gesturing down at them. "I may not be, you know, quite so trendy as you two, but I know that nobody wears fringed leather pants outside of gay porno." 

Josh giggled, innocent and unsuspecting, and I felt something twist inside my gut. I felt awful lying to him, but I also didn't want to call Justin out right in front of him. Clearly the whole issue was something Justin didn't feel like discussing, and I was sure he'd feel even less like talking about it if I forced the issue in front of his best friend. 

"Jack? You OK?" Josh asked, watching my face. 

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Why?" I asked, facing the mirror again. 

"I dunno," Josh said, stepping up behind me to look over my shoulder. "You made a weird face there for a second." 

The dressing room was starting to feel a little cramped with both of them in there. 

"I think I'd like to get out of these pants now," I said, turning to face both of them. "And there's barely room for me in here, much less both of you." 

"Why don't I take these shirts up to the front?" Justin asked quickly, grabbing the ones from the keeper pile. His face had settled back into a normal expression. "The girl can start ringing them up while you get dressed again." 

"Oh, good idea," Josh said. "Grab that other pair of pants, too, the ones without the fringe. They'll still look good with those." 

"Yeah, OK," Justin said, practically bolting from the stall. 

Justin swung the door shut so hard it hit Josh in the back, toppling him into me. We slid backward, his hands on my bare chest, until my back hit the cold mirror, and I yelped. 

"You OK?" Josh asked, his hands on my arms as we both regained our balance. 

"Yeah, the mirror's just cold," I said. "Let me get these pants off." 

"Need some help?" Josh asked, unsnapping the top button. "I like taking your pants off." 

"As much as I'd like to say yes, Josh," I began, stepping away from him, "we're in the mall. On the other side of that mirror, there's probably a camera, or a person, and as much as they might like the show, I don't want someone to recognize you." 

"You're right," he sighed, leaning back against the wall. 

I quickly slid out of the pants, and Josh handed me mine, and then handed me my shirt. I sat on the bench to pull my shoes on. 

"Hey, is everything ok with Justin?" Josh asked, looking down at me. 

"I think so," I said, swallowing. "Why?" 

"I don't know," Josh answered. "He's just seemed kind of off for the last day or two, and I know he and Brit are having some problems right now." 

"Well, why don't you talk to him about it?" I asked. Maybe Justin would talk to Josh about watching us the other night, since I was pretty sure that was at least one of the things bothering him. 

"Justin and I don't really talk as much as we used to," Josh sighed, sitting down next to me. "He's been talking to you, though, hasn't he?" 

"A little," I said, shrugging. 

"He seems to like you, and to trust you," Josh said. "Do you think he's ok?" 

"I think so," I said. It was basically true. "I think he's just working some stuff out right now. I mean, Josh, he's only twenty years old, and he's in a somewhat serious relationship, but also very much in the public eye. I'm sure he's got a lot to think about, just like the rest of you." 

"You're probably right," Josh said, shrugging. 

I heard a knock at the door of the stall. 

"Yes?" I asked. 

Justin poked his head in, saw us sitting together on the bench, and smiled. 

"Are you two having a moment?" he asked, grinning. "Because the girl up front wants to ring this all up." 

"I think we're good," I said. "Josh?" 

"Yeah, we're good," he agreed as we both stood. 

After we finished in that store, Justin wanted to stop by a record store. I wanted to give Josh a chance to talk to him, so I suggested that I take the bags down to the car, since we had accumulated quite a lot of them, and then I'd meet them back at the store. Josh agreed that it was a good idea, and whispered a "Thanks. I love you," in my ear as I took the bags from him. Dragging them down the mall, I realized that I really hadn't been keeping track of how much Josh was spending, until I loaded them into the back of Justin's Mercedes, counting out all nine bags. 

"Good God," I marveled. There was a lot more than one outfit in there, and that was really all I thought we were leaving the house for. 

By the time I got done loading the bags in and locking the car back up, Josh and Justin had left the record store, and were sitting on a bench out front. The two of them had their heads together out front, leaning toward each other, smiling and talking in low voices. I saw them together, completely oblivious to the world around them, or to any of the people walking by, and I smiled. The two of them were still friends, no matter what either of them was worried about. They just needed a little push every once in a while, and I was glad that I'd helped them with it. As I walked up to them, from the back, I caught a little of their conversation. 

"But what's it like?" Justin asked. "I mean, is it kind of the same, or what?" 

"Well, you know, not exactly, " Josh answered. "I mean, all the pieces don't line up the same way." 

"But it doesn't feel funny?" Justin asked. 

"No, it doesn't," Josh answered. "If anything, what I was doing before, with girls, felt funny. This feels right to me, Justin. This is who I am." 

"And the rest is the same?" Justin asked. "The way you feel?" 

"Yes, Justin," Josh said. "I feel complete. I feel like everything I had before, everyone I dated and thought I loved, was just like playing before this. I love Jack, Justin, for real." 

"Then I'm happy for you, bro, " Justin said, smiling. "Hey, where is Jack? He's been gone forever." 

"Should we go look for him?" Josh asked, starting to rise. 

"There you guys are!" I said, approaching the bench. "Miss me?" 

"Of course I did," Josh said, as they both stood. 

His smile washed over me, and I realized that I really did love him, too. 

"What did you buy at the record store?" I asked, looking at the bags next to them. 

"Uh, more stuff?" Justin answered, smiling. 

"Because the trunk isn't already full," I said, shaking my head. "Come on. Let's go home before the two of you buy anything else." 

The three of us walked down to the car, Josh and I side by side, and Justin a few steps off from us, humming to himself. When we got to Justin's car, Josh surprised me by climbing in the backseat with me. 

"Hey, no funny stuff," Justin said, checking the rearview mirror. 

"I promise," Josh said, sliding over until he was pressed against me. 

"What are you doing?" I asked, laughing. 

"I haven't been able to get close to you all day," Josh said, taking my hand and laying his head on my shoulder. "I missed you." 

"I missed you, too," I answered, kissing him on the forehead. I snuggled closer to him, enjoying the warmth of his closeness, resting my head on top of his. 

Josh's hands were soft, his fingers long, and he had a little bit of brown hair sprinkled over the back. When he held my hand, he always laced his fingers through mine, and locked them, keeping us as close as possible. I looked down at our hands for a moment, and when I looked up Justin was watching us in the rearview mirror. As my eyes met his, he quickly looked away. 

"Did you have fun today?" Josh asked, whispering softly against my neck. 

"I did," I answered. "Did you have fun?" 

"Yeah," he answered. "And we're going to have even more fun later." 

"Sounds like a plan to me," I said, smiling. 

We unloaded all of the bags from the car onto the table on the patio, so that we could figure out whose stuff was whose. Josh pulled the record store bag away from me before I could even glance inside, and tried to cover it by handing me a bag of shoes. I chided him that his taste in music must be really, really awful if he was ashamed to even let me look in the bag, and he still refused. While we were sorting Justin's stuff out from ours, Chris walked by, and we invited him to come out with us that night. He enthusiastically agreed. When we had everything sorted out, Josh and I took his many purchases upstairs, where I dumped them next to the couch and began removing tags and folding everything back up. Josh walked by and ruffled my hair, bending down to kiss me. 

"You're so practical," he said, chewing on my ear a little. 

"And you're so over the top, " I said, laughing. "There are more clothes here than I've bought myself in a year, Josh. I'm never going to have places to wear all of these." 

"Yes you will," he said, standing back up. "I promise. You want me to just call for a pizza for dinner? We can eat it while we get ready." 

"Works for me," I said, trying not to look at the price tags as I removed them. Why didn't stores do this themselves? Josh ordered the pizza, and then turned back to me. 

"It'll be about forty-five minutes," he said. 

"Perfect," I said, smiling. "Come here." 

Josh walked over and stood in front of me, looking down. I looked up at him and smiled. 

"What's up?" he asked. 

"Hopefully you," I answered, grabbing him by his belt loops, pulling him closer. 

Josh looked down at me, licking his lips, as I quickly undid his pants and let them drop to the floor. Grabbing his boxer briefs, I pulled them down quickly to his ankles, and his hard cock sprang out, almost hitting me in the face. Leaning forward, I let my slips slide over it as I took him, quickly, all the way into my mouth, until my face was pressed against his abs, my nose tickled by his hair. 

"Oh, Jack," he half whispered, throwing his head back quickly before looking down at me again. 

I pulled back a little, feeling the ridges along his shaft slide past my lips, until just his head was still in my mouth. I sucked lightly on it, running my tongue along the ridge around the base of it, feeling it pulse and throb. I swirled my tongue over the head, caressing it, sliding the tip through his slit as he groaned and dropped his hands to my head. They tangled in my hair, not pushing, just resting. 

Josh's eyes were closed, and he was turning his head from side to side, panting my name over and over, as I ran my hands up and down his thighs, squeezing, feeling the strong muscles of his legs flex and strain. I sucked lightly on his cock, sinking back into the couch, and pulling him along with me. Without letting his cock slide from my mouth, I pulled him back until he was kneeling on the couch, a knee on either side of my hips, and his hands on the back, supporting himself. My hands crawled up to his ass, feeling it clench as he began to push in and out of my eager mouth, slowly at first, but then harder. 

"Oh, God, Jack," he panted, looking down at me, watching as his slick pole slid through my opened lips again and again. 

I looked up at him and smiled around his cock as best I could, and then hummed around it, watching his eyes close with dreamy pleasure again. Abruptly I pulled all the way off of him, letting his cock fly out of my mouth with a wet pop. It smacked against his abs, causing his eyes to fly open, and then as it dipped back down toward me I began to lick up and down it with my outstretched tongue, attacking it like a giant candy cane. Catlike, I swiped my tongue up and down Josh's shaft, over the huge vein along the bottom, up and down the velvety throbbing smoothness of it, over the head, which was slightly salty with the precum he'd begun leaking. I dipped down to his balls for a second, and then swabbed my tongue all the way up the underside of his cock and over the head before I took him in my mouth again. 

Josh stopped chanting my name, and was just releasing a stream of incoherent noises and high-pitched sighs of pleasure. He began to thrust in and out of my mouth again, faster, and with more urgency, his cock sliding over my tongue as I lay back on the couch, stroking his legs, running my hands over the hair on his thighs and feeling it scratch at my palms as I felt his thighs flex and release, his ass clench and relax. Abruptly Josh grabbed my head again with his hands, holding me in place as his whole body froze, and with a single sound, half yelp and half sigh, I felt him pumping his seed into my mouth. Pulling back a little against the pressure of his hands I swiped my tongue over the now supersensitive head of his cock, and felt him shoot again into my throat. 

Staying in place for a moment as I continued to suck lightly on his still hard cock, Josh finally pulled out of my mouth and slid off of me, collapsing next to me on the couch. I slid over and kissed him on the cheek, and he grabbed my head, turning, and kissed me on the lips. 

"What was that for?" he asked, panting. 

"Do I need a reason?" I asked, sliding my tongue quickly up the side of his face. He groaned. "It's because I love you, silly." 

"I love you, too," Josh answered, kissing me again, dipping his tongue quickly into my mouth to press it against mine. 

"I heard a little bit of what you said to Justin today," I said, as he stood to pull his pants up. I took his hands as he looked down at me. "Josh, everything I've ever done before this has been like a game, too, but I can tell that this is real. I love you, Josh." 

"I love you, too," he repeated, sinking back down onto the couch. 

Taking my face in his hands, he tilted it up toward his, and brought his lips down to crush them over mine. Our tongues sought each other out urgently as Josh and I held each other's faces, our lips pressed wetly together. We were still on the couch, kissing and holding each other, not even speaking, when the pizza guy buzzed from the front entrance. Josh jumped up, zipping and buttoning his pants. 

"You want me to go down with you?" I asked, sitting up. I could tell by feel that my hair was a mess from his hands running through it, and I thought I might have a hickey developing on my neck again. 

"I'll be ok," he said, smiling and smoothing his own hair down. "Why don't you grab a couple of paper plates?" 

"Sure," I said, heading for the kitchen. 

We ate the pizza fairly quickly, the two of us demolishing the entire thing. We sat on the couch together eating it, feeding pieces to each other, but not in that scary "9 « Weeks" push the entire slice into the mouth at once way. After we ate, we both jumped in the shower, washing each other quickly, but avoiding ripping the curtain down this time, and went to get dressed. I was in the bathroom in a pair of pants, fixing my hair, when Josh appeared behind me in the mirror with something hidden in his hands. 

"Close your eyes," he said, standing right behind me. 

I did, and felt something cold tap against my breastbone as I felt Josh's fingers on the back of my neck. 

"Open," he whispered. 

I opened my eyes, and saw his looking expectantly at me in the mirror. Looking down, I saw that Josh had put a necklace on me, a round silver pendant on a black cord that matched the necklace he always wore. On the front was the sign for Scorpio, my sign, and on the back was Leo, Josh's sign. 

"Oh, Josh," I said, turning around and kissing him. "Thank you." 

"I changed mine, too," he said, holding his up so I could see that his now had a Scorpio on the back. "Now you can always touch that, wherever you are, and think of me." 

"I thought you never took that necklace off," I said, remembering something I'd read online. 

"That was before," Josh said, kissing me again. "Now let's finish getting dressed." 

When we were dressed, and Josh pronounced my outfit completely acceptable for a night of clubbing and dancing, we walked downstairs to meet the others, while I tugged uncomfortably at my clothes and tried to tuck my shirt in. 

"Stop that," Josh said, pulling my hands away from the bottom of the shirt. "You look fine." 

"Better than fine!" Chris said from behind me. "You look spectacular. Fabulous. You superstar." 

I blushed in the face of this tirade of flattery, which I couldn't believe could be sincere. 

"Stop," I said. "I know I'm stunning, but I don't look that good." 

"If you were a chick, I'd be all over you," Chris said, lighting up a cigarette. 

"Aaaaah! Chris! Not near me!" Josh said, waving his hand at the smoke. I decided that I wouldn't be having a cigarette, either. 

"JC, don't get upset, but Lance isn't coming," Chris said carefully. "He called and said that he wanted to stay in tonight, and think." 

Josh's face fell, but he quickly tried to pretend that it didn't really bother him. 

"His loss," Josh said brightly. I squeezed his hand. 

Above us we heard a door slam, and Britney began to pound down the steps, her platform boots almost clanging as she walked down to join us. Justin followed several steps behind her, and they both looked rather cross. 

"Are we ready?" Brit demanded, glaring at the three of us. 

"Sure," Josh answered, looking back and forth from her to Justin. 

"Who's driving?" I asked, trying to change the subject. 

"We ordered a car," Chris said. "You know, we figured we'd take you out celebrity style. Limo, red carpet, VIP entrance, give you something to write home about." 

"Thanks," I said, as we all began walking to the car. 

Josh held my hand the whole way, and sat next to me in the limo. Chris sat on the other side of him, not smoking, but playing with his lighter. Justin and Britney sat across from us, not looking at each other, the empty seat yawning between them. I wondered what they were fighting about, and if we should say anything. Nobody else was, and they all knew them a lot better than I did, so I held my tongue as well. Justin looked pretty upset, and Britney looked pretty pissed off. I hoped they'd still be able to enjoy themselves. 

"So, I see you guys are a matching set now," Chris said, pointing at my neck. 

"Yeah, it was a gift from Josh," I said, kissing him on the cheek. 

"I changed mine, too," Josh said, flipping it to show Chris the other side. 

"Oooh, this must really be serious," Chris said, shaking his head and smiling at us. 

When we arrived at the club, there was a quick straightening of clothing and adjusting of hair as the limousine pulled to a stop in front of the covered walkway. I could see people lined up on both sides of velvet ropes, and a lot of photographers. The driver came around to open the door, and Justin and Britney climbed out first, holding hands and beaming smiles toward the photographers as if nothing was wrong. Chris, Josh, and I followed, in a line, behind the two of them. I didn't really know what to do as everyone else stopped a few times to smile and wave at the photographers, so I just smiled, too, trying not to look too wide eyed and foolish. 

The doorman greeted the guys and Britney warmly, and I gathered they were semi- regulars here. He eyed me speculatively. 

"This is Jack Springer, my close, personal friend," Josh said, smiling at me. "Please add him to my guest list." 

"All of our lists, actually, " Chris said from the other side. "He's a friend of the whole band." 

"Certainly, Mr. Chasez, Mr. Kirkpatrick," the doorman said, writing my name down. 

Chris thanked him, shaking his hand and depositing some folded money there. I followed everyone else inside and tapped Chris on the shoulder. 

"What was that?" I asked. 

"This place is a little exclusive," he said, shrugging. "Members and guests. You're now officially a guest." 

"It keeps the press out," Josh explained from the other side of me. "Come on. Let's go grab some drinks, and then get dancing." 

We had a really good time at the club. We got a few drinks into us, and everyone loosened up a little bit. Justin and Britney forgot that they were mad at each other, or just put on a really good show of faking it, and spent most of the evening dancing together. Chris, Josh, and I somehow ended up dancing with this group of female models that Chris knew. I wasn't sure if he was dating one of them or not, but they all seemed like very nice girls. I saw a couple of famous people, and Josh was nice enough to introduce me to a few as I was standing going, "Oh my God! Josh! Do you know who that is?" Like the guys, they were all pretty good-natured, and seemed pretty amused at my gushing. 

The high point of the evening, though, was when the DJ, recognizing his famous guests, started playing "Bye Bye Bye" and loudly calling for the guys to come out to the dance floor. Laughing, Josh, Justin, and Chris ran out, lining up, and Britney jumped in, too. They began dancing, smiling widely and hamming it up as everyone clapped and cheered, but there were still only four of them, and Josh waved for me to come out and join them. I shook my head, and he ran over and pulled me out onto the dance floor. 

"Josh, I can't do this!" I yelled, laughing. "I don't know the steps." 

Josh turned me around, and put his hands on my hips. 

"When I move, you move!" he yelled, so I followed his lead. 

I wasn't a spectacular dancer, and I still missed a lot of the steps, but feeling Josh's hands on me, pushing and pulling me, while everyone else laughed and clapped, I felt like I was on top of the world. When the song ended, the room burst into applause, and then everyone quickly surged back onto the dance floor as the next song started and the lights went back down. Josh pulled me into a quick hug. 

"I love you," he whispered, right against my ear. 

"I love you, too," I whispered back, before we separated. 

"That was great!" Chris yelled, slapping me on the back. "When we kick JC out of the band, you can take his spot!" 

"Hey!" Josh said, playfully smacking his arm. 

"The kid's got talent," Chris said, smirking and shrugging. 

"Like you wouldn't believe," Josh said, winking suggestively. 

"Oh, damn it, too much information," Chris yelled, still grinning and plastering his hands over his ears. 

We were all still grinning and laughing on the way home, babbling excitedly about this person we had talked to or seen. Josh kept nuzzling my neck, and I kept pushing him off. When I looked up, I saw Justin watching us as Britney glared out the window as if the streets outside had somehow offended her. When the car got back to the building, Josh and I raced inside, calling a quick goodnight to the others as we hurriedly keyed open the apartment. 

As soon as the door closed we were all over each other like rabbits in heat. Josh pressed me up against the wall, grabbing my shirt and tearing it open, buttons flying everywhere as his mouth crawled over mine and our hips ground together. As he slid down my chest, nibbling his way toward my waist, I grabbed his shirt with both hands, and he raised his arms above his head, allowing me to pull it off. I tossed it aside quickly, and finished pulling my own off as Josh began to chew on my hard cock through the fabric of my pants. 

He had his hands on the waist, undoing the top button, when we heard the knock at the door. Both of us froze, me against the wall and Josh on his knees. 

"What the hell?" he asked. 

"Somebody's timing sucks," I said. 

We heard another flurry of knocking. 

"Better answer," I said, following him to the door. 

Josh pulled it open, and we saw Justin standing on the doorstep. His face was red, his chest heaving. 

"Can I stay with you guys?" he asked, his voice cracking. "Brit kicked me out." 

Before either of us could say anything, Justin wrapped his arms around Josh and burst into tears. 

---

CHAPTER 14

---

"Hey, Justin, it'll be ok," Josh said haltingly, looking over Justin's shoulder at me with his eyebrows raised. 

I shrugged and waved him toward the couch, figuring we should at least get Justin inside, so we could close the door and calm him down. As Josh led him over to the couch, Justin sniffled and wiped his nose, beginning to collect himself. His face was still red, but the tears had apparently just been a passing shower, for which I was thankful. I'd never been around so many guys who cried so much, and was starting to wonder if there was some kind of eye-irritant in the pool. 

Watching Josh sit next to Justin on the couch, Josh's smooth shoulders gleaming in the light of the one lamp turned on. I watched the shadows play across his face, amplifying his expression of concern, and emphasizing the ridges and hollows of his muscular chest, and I suddenly became aware that we were both shirtless, and my pants were undone. Our shirts were flung across the carpet in two different directions, and I was a little embarrassed. I've always been a person who thinks sex between two people should be private. 

Then again, we'd had sex in front of Justin already, even if Josh didn't know it and Justin wouldn't talk about it. 

Closing the door to our apartment, I scooped my shirt up off the floor and pulled it on. I tried to close it, but it only had one button left, the rest having flown off when Josh had practically torn it off of me. I threw Josh his shirt as well, and he caught it with one hand, not looking away from Justin, and casually shrugged it on. 

"You OK now?" he asked Justin, who was still sniffling. 

I handed Justin a couple of napkins from the table. 

"Thanks," he said weakly, rubbing his nose with one. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bust in on you guys like this. I just, you know." 

"It's ok," Josh said. "Do you want to talk about it?" 

"Why don't I go give you guys some privacy?" I suggested, heading toward the bedroom. 

"No, no, you don't have to go," Justin said quickly. "I don't want to talk right now, anyway." 

Justin dropped his face into his hands. Sitting on the back of the couch, I put a hand on his shoulder as Josh put one on his knee. Justin's shoulders shook as he began sobbing again, and Josh leaned over and wrapped him in a hug as I went to the kitchen for a glass. One of our stops the other day when Josh and I had gone grocery shopping was at the liquor store, and I carefully poured out a shot of tequila. It wasn't the best counseling gesture, of course, but it would calm Justin down in a hurry. I walked over, perching on the back of the couch again, and tapped him on the shoulder. 

"Justin, I want you to drink this, ok?" I said. "It's going to taste like ass, but I want you to just swallow the whole thing." 

Josh looked at me quizzically, and Justin looked up at me, his cheeks streaked with tears, his eyes red. 

"What is it?" he asked, reaching out for the glass. 

"It'll help you fall asleep, " I said. It would, too. Justin wasn't a big drinker, so this would probably knock him down quickly. 

Justin took the glass, glanced at me, and then swallowed it whole, drinking it all down quickly. He almost dropped the glass as he began coughing. 

"Are you sure that was a good idea?" Josh asked me. 

"Well, I guess technically no, since he's not of legal drinking age, but yeah, I do," I said. 

"What the hell was that?" Justin asked. 

"Tequila," I said. "I thought maybe you could use a shot." 

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Josh asked. "It might help." 

Justin thought about it for a second, but then shook his head. 

"I don't think I can right now," Justin said, shaking his head. 

"Justin, are you ok?" I asked. 

"I., no, no I'm not," he said, his face scrunching up again. 

"Hey! No more crying," I said, pulling him up off the couch. 

"Why don't we check on the other bedroom, and we can talk about all of this in the morning, ok?" Josh asked, taking Justin's arm. 

"Yeah, thanks," Justin said, walking toward the bedroom. 

I hadn't known Justin for very long, but I had never seen him like he was at that moment. He seemed shorter, somehow, walking with his shoulders hunched and his head down. His face was still blotchy red, his eyes puffy, and that open, smiling glow that he gave off was completely dark. He moved across the living room as if he expected one of us to start yelling at him, and I wondered for a second how bad the argument could have been, and what it possibly could have been about. Justin seemed crushed, like a broken flower, dimmed somehow, as if someone had reached inside of him and twisted some kind of lighting control. Glancing at Josh, I saw the strain behind the neutral expression he was struggling to keep, and realized that he saw it, too. 

We flicked on the light in the second bedroom, and I checked to make sure there were sheets on the bed. Josh organized some of his stuff, pushing it into an area of general mess around the keyboard, instead of all over the room, and Justin sat down on the bed and began to take off his shoes. 

"Are you gonna be ok in here?" Josh asked, as we both stood in the doorway, watching Justin take off his shoes. 

"Yeah," Justin sighed. "Thanks for letting me stay with you guys." 

He looked up at us, and, I think for the first time, actually looked. My shirt was hanging open, only that one remaining button fastened, and Josh's shirt was inside out. 

"Oh, God, you guys were gonna.," Justin began, and then his voice trailed off. "I'm sorry." 

"Don't worry about it," I said, shrugging. 

"You're more important," Josh agreed. "Why don't you go on to sleep now, and we'll sort this all out in the morning. We're right next door if you need us." 

"Thank you," Justin said, still staring at us. "Both of you." 

We closed Justin's door, leaving him to get undressed and maybe cry himself to sleep, and I followed Josh to our room, closing our door as well. I turned to Josh, undoing my one button as he stripped off his shirt. 

"Josh, he's not ok," I said. "Whatever they argued about, he's taking it really badly." 

"I know," Josh agreed, sitting on the bed to take off his shoes. 

I sat across from him in the chair that had been in the corner of the bedroom since Justin moved it the other night and began unlacing my shoes as well. 

"What are we going to do?" Josh asked. "He doesn't want to talk about it." 

"I think he's just too upset to talk about it right now," I said, pulling off my socks and standing to undo my pants. "Maybe in the morning, after a good night's sleep, he'll be up for it." 

"I hope so," Josh said, leaving for the bathroom to go brush his teeth. 

After we had both brushed out teeth, and settled into bed, I snuggled up against Josh. I slid my hands over his bare back, feeling the expansion of his breathing, and moved my hands around to the front, rumbling up the ridges of his abs, tracing over the arcs of his pecs, thumbing his nipples as I kissed his shoulder. He made a little noise of contentment and flexed back against me, his body pressing gently back against mine, our legs twining together, the hair on our calves bristling and scraping. 

"Did you have fun tonight?" he whispered quietly. 

"Sure did," I said, nibbling his ears as my hands continued roaming over him. 

He caught my hands in his and brought them to his mouth, kissing the backs of my hands, and my palms, before holding them tightly in his own hands against his chest. Through the firm, warmly smooth skin of his pec, I could feel his heart beating against my flattened palm. I slid my other hand back down his abs, feeling the smooth strands of the hair below his navel as I followed it down to the front of his boxer briefs. Cupping gently over the front of them, I felt his throbbing cock jump against my hand, and I began to gently massage it, stroking and squeezing through the thin fabric as I kissed and nipped at the nape of his neck. 

"Jack," Josh groaned, folding his hand over mine, pulling me away from him. 

"Yeah?" I asked, nipping at his ear again. 

"I don't think this is a good idea," he whispered. I froze, and he rolled over, so that he was facing me, and he took my face in his hands. Leaning in, he kissed me. "I just, you know, with Justin in the other room there, and he's so upset, I just don't feel right about, you know, doing this right now. I wouldn't want him to hear us or something, because it would probably get him thinking about Brit and he'd just get more upset." 

Actually, Josh, I don't think hearing us would upset him half as much as you seem to, I was thinking. I debated saying something, but instead just leaned over and kissed him again. 

"Sure, Josh," I sighed. 

"You understand, right?" he asked. "You sound upset." 

"Honestly?" I asked. "Yes, I understand, and I guess I agree. I love you, Josh, and if you don't want to do something, I'm ok with it." 

"I do want to do something, Jack," he sighed. "I always do. I just don't think tonight is a good night for it." 

"That's fine, baby," I said, kissing him again. 

"Why don't you slide over here a little, and get yourself right up against me, and we'll go to sleep, ok?" he asked, holding his arms out to me. 

"Sure, Josh," I said again, sliding over. 

I felt Josh's strong arms fold around me, pulling me tight, and I felt him, still hard, pressing into my ass. Josh kissed the back of my neck and held me tightly. 

"I love you, Jack," he whispered. 

"I love you, too," I replied, and we fell asleep. 

Josh was still in bed with me when I woke up the next morning. I rolled over, and he was lying on his side, facing me, his head propped up on one arm. 

"Hey," I said, smiling. 

Josh smiled back, his face beaming. His hair was tousled, a mess of blond and brown strands, and he needed a shave. The sheet was pulled down to his waist, leaving me a good view of his firm torso, with its washboard abs, curving pecs, and perky brown nipples. Josh was watching me with a smooth expression of contentment on his face, with just a hint of something else mixed in. 

"What are you doing?" I asked, propping my own head up with one of my arms, facing him. I watched his eyes roam down my body and back to my face. 

"Watching you sleep," he answered, reaching out to caress my face gently with one hand. I nuzzled against it. "I woke up, and you looked so peaceful and relaxed that I didn't want to accidentally wake you by getting out of bed." 

"So you just decided to lay in bed and watch me?" I asked, smiling. "I can't really be that entertaining of a show, Josh." 

"But you are," he answered, his blue eyes twinkling. "I watched your eyes, bouncing around behind your eyelids, and wondered what you were dreaming about. I watched your chest rise and fall, and thought about how much I wanted to lick it. I watched your face, and thought about how peaceful you looked, and I thought about how I'd watch any part of you, any time, because I love you." 

"I love you, too," I said, kissing the back of the hand he was stroking my face with. "Any sign of our houseguest, yet?" 

"No, I haven't heard him," Josh said, sighing. "I think he's still asleep." 

"Maybe we should get up, before he does," I said. 

Josh pointed at the obvious morning bulge in my boxers. 

"It looks like you're up already," he said, smiling. His hand drifted down from my face to my crotch, and began to lazily stroke my cock through the thin cotton. 

"I could say the same for you," I said, pointing. "I thought you were worried that Justin might hear us." 

"I am," Josh said. "But I don't think he would if we were in the shower." 

I pushed his hand away and jumped out of bed. 

"Race you!" I blurted, springing for the bathroom. 

Josh lunged out of bed right after me, dragging half of the sheets across the room with him. The two of us burst into the bathroom like we had the other day, the day we had accidentally somehow ripped the shower curtain down, giggling and groping each other. I twisted the water on and we stripped out of our underwear as quickly as we could, casting it haphazardly aside as we jumped into the shower, pulling the curtain closed. We faced each other, the water pounding down on us, cascading down both our bodies, as Josh grabbed my head and pulled my face to his. As his tongue pressed its way into my mouth, scraping against mine, our hand rolled over each other's bodies. 

"That was dignified," Josh said, laughing. He kissed me again, tilting my head up as he attacked my neck, nuzzling and nibbling. 

"I guess I'm just hot for you," I said, pulling his head back up so I could kiss him again. 

"I think I'll just have to make you wait a little, then," he said, grabbing the shower gel and sponge. "First we'll get the washing out of the way, and then we'll get to the important stuff." 

"Hey, hygiene is extremely important," I said, reaching for the shampoo. 

"Yeah, but it's not exactly what got you charging into the bathroom," Josh said, laughing. 

"Valid point," I agreed. 

Josh and I had always had a lot of fun in the shower, from the very first one we'd taken together. Both of us were people who liked to touch, and we both gloried in each other's bodies. Washing each other was a pleasurable, sensual experience, but was also a lot of fun. Both of us treated it like an extended massage, and we both had parts that we preferred. Josh loved washing my shoulders and back, soaping them, rubbing, and kneading, leaving me completely relaxed. I, on the other hand, loved washing Josh's hair, running my hands through it, massaging his scalp, watching his eyes slide blissfully closed as he smiled beatifically. 

As he ducked his head under the spray, rinsing out the shampoo, I dropped my shampoo covered hand to his cock and began to lightly stroke, wrapping my fingers around him, feeling him throb. Josh moaned, leaning back against the wall, as I brought both hands to his cock, stroking in opposite directions at once, squeezing and feeling his hips jerk as I swirled my palms over his cockhead. 

"Sure feels like you're ready, Josh," I whispered in his ear, tugging on his earlobe with my teeth as I kept both of my hands busy. 

"God, yes, Jack," he groaned, opening his eyes. 

Josh's blue eyes were smoldering pools of lust. I turned around quickly and pressed my ass against him. 

"Why don't we put that somewhere more comfortable?" I asked trampily, smiling. "Soap me up, babe." 

"God yes," Josh said, laughing. 

Before Josh could do anything, though, we were interrupted by knocking on the bathroom door. 

"Guys?" Justin called. "Are you almost done with the bathroom?" 

I covered my face with my hand, sighing in exasperation. 

"We'll be right out," Josh called. 

"Good thing we washed first, " I grumbled. 

Josh and I hurriedly got out of the shower, dried off, and combed our hair. Wrapping our towels around our waists, we stepped out of the bathroom, and saw Justin, his towel tied at the waist as well, sitting on the couch. A long expanse of tanned thigh was visible between the gap in his towel, which shifted alarmingly on his slim hips as he stood. 

"Good morning," Justin said softly, staring at the two of us before quickly jerking his eyes back up to our faces. 

"Morning," I muttered. "Bathroom's all yours." 

"Good morning, Justin," Josh said. "How did you sleep?" 

"Fine," Justin answered. 

"Why don't we talk after breakfast?" I suggested, strangely unsettled by the fact that we were all standing around in our towels. 

The two of them shrugged, nearly identically, and I realized again how similar the two of them were. They shared so many of the same mannerisms, and they were so close, and I suddenly felt very selfish for being annoyed at the sudden lack of sex in mine and Josh's relationship. After all, Josh and I were in love, and love was about more than sex. We could go a day or two, while Justin stayed with us. Surely we could. 

Justin was just getting out of the shower after Josh and I finished dressing, and he went to get dressed while the two of us worked on a quick breakfast. Josh whispered again to me to ask if I was upset, and I explained again that I wasn't upset. 

"Josh, I love you," I said. "I don't mind if we lay off for a couple days. Let's concentrate on helping out Justin and Brit, and then we'll get back to us." 

"I love you," Josh said, leaning over to kiss me as I fought with the coffeemaker. Someday I was going to win. 

"What's for breakfast?" Justin asked from by the refrigerator. 

Josh and I pulled apart, and I grumbled inwardly, but plastered a quick smile on. Justin still looked pretty down, and actually had dark circles under his eyes. He was leaning dejectedly on the side of the refrigerator, his arms folded, looking at us but not smiling. 

"I'm working on some pancakes," Josh said, turning back to the stove. 

Justin slumped into a chair, and Josh and I sat down as well. As we began to eat, I decided there was no point in beating around the bush. 

"OK, Justin," I began. "What exactly did you and Brit fight about?" 

"I don't know," Justin sighed, pushing his bacon around the plate with his fork. "She said for the past couple days I haven't really been paying attention to her, and then last night she said I was looking at some other girl while we were out at the club, and then she said I don't love her, and then she said I didn't make her feel special, and I took her for granted, and then she threw a vase at me, and then I came over here." 

"Oh, ok then," I said. That was quite a list of complaints. 

"Maybe you should try talking to her today," Josh suggested. "She might have calmed down a little." 

After breakfast, Justin went next door to his place, while Josh and I started doing the dishes. We didn't get very much done before he was back, crying again, and holding a crumpled note in his hands. Josh rushed over to him and led him to the couch, consoling him. I brought him some tissues, and when he calmed down he showed us the note. 

"Justin - Don't come back until you can treat me with respect. I have feelings, too, and I'm not gonna be your doormat. Don't come back until you're sorry!" 

Somehow the note would have carried more weight with me if there were not stars dotting the I's, but it was plenty upsetting for Justin. 

"She wouldn't even open the door!" Justin sniffled, wiping his nose. "She just yelled through it." 

"Maybe she's not ready to talk yet," I said. "Maybe she needs a gesture first, to kind of butter her up." 

"I know a florist," Josh said, smiling. I remembered the truckload of roses Josh had sent me. 

"Josh, go find the number," I said, forcing gaiety I didn't feel. We really needed something to lift Justin's spirits. "Justin, what's Britney's favorite flower?" 

After much arguing, I finally managed to convince the two of them that it was much more romantic to have just one bouquet delivered. 

"Have the guy bring it here, first, and you can fill out the card yourself," I said, as Josh put in a rush order. 

The whole thing seemed like such a good idea, and Justin was looking really hopeful. The guy stopped by as planned, and Justin wrote a quick, "I love you, Pinky," on the card. Josh was just about to congratulate me when we heard the crash of glass breaking against our apartment door. Opening it carefully, I saw a pile of flowers and broken glass on the welcome mat. 

"Josh, go get a broom," I said evenly. "This is going to take a little more than we thought." 

Our next suggestion, since Britney wouldn't answer the door at Justin's apartment ("How does that work, exactly?" I asked Josh quietly. "It's in his name, not hers." "Jack, that's not helpful."), was that Justin call her. After being hung up on three times in a row, Justin was unwilling to continue trying to call her on any of her phones. 

"OK, I think we should give up," I said, throwing my hands in the air. The two of them gaped at me. "Not permanently, but we've thought about this all day, and, let's face it, guys, the three of us suck at this." 

"You said I was romantic," Josh said, frowning. 

"You are, babe," I said, hugging him. "But you also had a willing participant. It's really easy to be romantic to someone who wants you to be. I, on the other hand, have all the romantic charm of a forty of beer and a pair of crotchless panties. This isn't my forte, and the two of you haven't thought of anything good, either, so I think we should just give up for a while. We can watch some movies and order some Chinese for dinner, and maybe we'll think of something by not thinking about it." 

"I like that idea," Justin said, shrugging. Since Justin liked it, Josh immediately agreed. 

We all changed into pajamas, Justin borrowing a set from Josh, and had a pretty quiet evening just watching movies and eating dinner. Josh and I snuggled together on the couch, and Justin sat alone in the chair. We watched all of "Star Wars", and about half of "Empire Strikes Back" before Josh, yawning, wandered off to bed. 

"Night, Jack," he said, kissing me on the forehead. 

"Night, Josh," I said, hugging him. "I'll be in soon." 

I wanted to finish the movie, and I didn't want Justin to feel like we were abandoning him. By the time the movie ended I was yawning, and about ready to turn in as well. 

"Jack, I have this idea," Justin began. I turned, wondering if we were finally going to finish the discussion I had started in the dressing room. "What if I wrote Brit a letter?" 

"I think that's a great idea, " I said, yawning and stretching. The bottom of my t-shirt rode up a little, and I watched Justin glance at the sliver peek of my abs. "Good night, Justin." 

"Night," he said. 

"There's paper by the keyboard in your bedroom," I said, and then went in to bed. 

Stripping down to my boxers, I slid under the covers with Josh. Half asleep, he snuggled up to me. 

"Hey, you up?" I asked, unsure. 

"Kind of," he answered, kissing me. 

I kissed him back, and then he kissed me again. He twisted in my arms, pulling me into another of those deep, tongue kisses, and suddenly the two of us were all over each other. Our hands roamed over each other, twisting, pulling, pinching, as our tongues fought. Josh flung the sheet aside and grabbed my boxers, tugging them down so hard I felt them rip. I grabbed his shoulders and rolled him over, so that I was straddling him, and I peeled his boxer briefs down. His hands crawled over my shoulders and laced through my hair as I leaned down and swallowed his already dripping cock whole. Josh let out a low moan, his whole body flexing as he slowly pushed forward with his hips, my lips sliding down his shaft, my tongue pressing against him as my nose collided with his pubes, brushing against his lowest abs. 

There was a single knock at the door, and Justin stuck his head in. 

"Jack, can I ask you - oh!" Justin said, eyes wide. 

"Jesus!" Josh blurted, slapping a pillow over his crotch and almost smothering me as I pulled off of him. "Justin? What are you doing?" 

As if carried by his own momentum, Justin stepped all the way into the doorway. I realized that I was lying naked and completely exposed on the bed, my hard cock in plain sight. Josh was holding a pillow over his crotch, and staring at Justin in confusion, but almost his entire body was on display as well. Justin stared at both of us, dropping the paper in his hand. 

"I.," he said softly. 

I don't know why I did it. As I stared at Justin, watching him stare at us, I watched the light and shadow play over the clinging t-shirt and cotton pajama bottoms he wore. I could see the press of his pecs and nipples against the shirt, and the barest hint of his abs, emphasized by the half light spilling over him. My eyes dropping lower, I could also see that he was completely hard, the front of the pajama pants tented. 

"You wanted something, didn't you, Justin?" I asked quietly, sliding off the bed. 

Justin's eyes widened as I walked toward him, my hard cock bouncing in front of me. I reached out and slid my hand down the line of his jaw, hearing his sharp intake of breath, and I dropped it lower, sliding it over to his chest. 

"Whatever you came in here for, you want something else, now, don't you?" I asked, brushing over one of his nipples. 

My hand slid lower, over the bulge of his cock, and he let out a soft moan, his hips jerking toward me. 

"Yes," he said quietly, his eyes on mine, drawing out the hiss at the end. His mouth hung open, and he seemed to be barely breathing. 

"Jack?" Josh asked from behind me. 

I glanced over my shoulder, and saw that Josh had sat up. The pillow had fallen away, and Josh was still completely hard, despite the confused look on his face. His eyes were glued to Justin and I, and I squeezed Justin's cock again. 

"Josh, I think Justin wants to watch," I said, turning back to Justin. "Don't you?" 

I let go of Justin's cock, staring into his eyes. 

"Yes," Justin whispered. 

---

CHAPTER 15

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I put my hands on Justin's shoulders, feeling him jump a little. He looked down at me, his eyes wide, his face tilted toward mine. Justin was breathing deeply through his open mouth, his chest rising and falling, straining against his t-shirt, and I felt the firm power of his shoulders as I pushed him gently backward. When his knees collided with the dining room chair in the corner, the same one Justin himself had moved into the bedroom the other night, he sat down, falling into it as if in a daze. His eyes were still locked on mine, until I turned, breaking the contact. 

Josh was kneeling at the head of the bed, his face still a mask of bewilderment, but his cock still jutted out, steely hard, from his hips, uncovered by the pillow that he had forgotten about. In the light spilling across the bed from the open doorway, I could see that his body was still responding, even if his mind wasn't yet. I walked toward him, watching my shadow roll over him, up his tightly flexed thighs, over his twitching, throbbing cock and full, low-hanging balls, over the granite sculpture of his abs, and the smooth curves of his chest. My shadow climbed past his pointed brown nipples, over his arms hanging at his sides in confusion, looking strong and sinewy even when relaxed, over the ridges of his collar bones and the strong lines of his neck. By the time it covered his face, hiding the sparkle of his blue eyes as they followed me in an undulating line across the room, I was at the foot of the bed, and I immediately began to crawl up the mattress to Josh. 

"Jack?" Josh asked again, softly. 

He sucked in his breath as I pressed against him, nuzzling under his neck as my fingers closed around his cock and began to slowly jerk him off. 

"He likes to watch, Josh," I whispered, smearing his leaking precum over the top of his cock. Josh inhaled sharply, watching Justin, and glancing over my shoulder I saw that Justin was motionless, watching us. "He watched us the other night, Josh. At the studio, through the window, and he didn't say a word." 

"Did you?" Josh asked, still staring at Justin. My hand continued working over Josh's prick, and his hips began to move a little, thrusting back and forth, his abs crunching. Aside from that, he hadn't moved since I crawled onto the bed. 

"Yeah," Justin whispered, still motionless in the chair. He had his hands on the arms, and his legs spread wide. I could see, glancing back, that he was still hard, his cock pressing against the fabric of the pajama pants. 

I continued to lick and suck and bite at Josh's neck, sliding my tongue over his jawline, nipping and tugging at his ear, as my hand continued to fondle and caress his throbbing cock. His hips were still moving a little, and I felt one of his hands sliding over my back to run through my hair. 

"Did you like it, Justin?" Josh whispered again. 

"Yeah," Justin answered from the chair. His voice was low and breathy, deeper than usual. 

Josh had a strong grip on my head now, using his hand to press me against him. I kept nibbling and biting at his neck, feeling his pulse. His heart was racing, and his breathing was picking up. My hand continued massaging him, squeezing and stroking as his hips began to thrust a little harder now, and I snaked my other hand up his back to bury my fingers in his hair, using it to pull his head to the side even as he pressed mine to him. 

"How did it make you feel, Justin?" Josh asked quietly. "How did it make you feel seeing me on my knees, watching me suck Jack?" 

There was a pause for a moment. The only sounds in the room were the almost inaudible rush of the three of us breathing, the occasional slurp or kiss of my lips on Josh's warm, firm neck, and a slight squeak of the bed. 

"Fucking hot," Justin answered softly. 

"You heard him, Josh," I said, turning Josh's head toward mine. "Let's give him a show." 

I pressed my lips against Josh's, feeling the slide of silk on silk, parting them with my tongue. For a moment, the tiniest moment, I felt him hesitate, and then he was kissing me, hard, grinding his face against mine, his tongue fighting its way into my mouth. Still holding my hair, he pulled me back off of his face, and then, sliding his hand around to the center of my chest, he pressed me backward into the bed. Releasing his cock, feeling it slide smoothly out of my hand, I threw my arms wide, collapsing backward onto the bed, and then Josh was on me, his mouth and hands everywhere at once. 

Pushing my arms out, Josh trailed down my chest, swiping his tongue over me as I writhed beneath him. He attacked one nipple, chewing and pulling and sucking, and then licked his way across to the other as I grabbed the back of his head, trying to pull him away from the sudden exquisite pleasure that was coursing through me. One of his hands was in my crotch, on my cock, stroking and tugging at it, and tilting my head back a little I saw Justin still frozen in the chair, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. Josh began to sink lower, and I tore my gaze away from Justin to watch the slow descent of Josh's head, his hair brushing over my chest as his tongue dipped into my navel and washed over my abs. I clutched at the sheets, my fingers twisting them, as I felt his tongue take a long, slow swipe over my cock, and then he pulled back. 

Leaning back on his haunches in a kneel again, every muscle in Josh's body was taught, standing out in sharp relief as he leaned back, one of his hands opening the nightstand drawer and reaching in for the lube. His hard, throbbing cock, the head brownish like his tanned erect nipples, jutted out above me, twitching as a long drop of clear precum seeped out from the head and rolled down the shaft. I was watching Josh, watching his chest and cock heave, as Josh watched Justin, watching us. I reached for Josh's cock, and, looking down, he pushed my hand away, gently yet firmly, as he dropped back down onto me again, swallowing my cock in one long, blissfully slow inhale. 

I felt my cock sliding wetly through the moist warmth of Josh's mouth, over the slippery roughness of his tongue, as he dived all the way down on me, pushing his nose against my stomach, swallowing hard. My back arched into the bed, lifting off of it for a moment as Josh pulled back, his lips caressing their way up my hard shaft until just my head was in his mouth, and he began to swirl his tongue over it, sucking gently at the same time. I ran my fingers through his hair, groaning his name, as I felt his fingers, dripping with lube, flutter over my ass. 

"Yeah, Josh," I groaned. 

Josh hummed around my cock as he swallowed it again, his tongue rolling over the curve of my shaft as I pushed into his throat, and I felt one of his fingers work its way inside. I tightened, surprised, but immediately loosened again as he began to bob quickly on my cock, sucking and swallowing, spit dripping out the sides of his mouth each time he pulled back. I continued running my hands through his hair, massaging his scalp, caressing the sides of his face, as he worked me over with his mouth and kept his hand busy at my ass. The friction of his fingers pushing their way inside created a spreading wave of warmth that washed through my body, radiating outward and rolling over me like hot oil. 

Every nerve in my body was on fire as Josh pulled off of me again, my cock sliding out of his mouth with a wet sucking noise. I looked up to see him again kneeling above me, nipples taught, abs crunching beautifully, chest rising and falling as he breathed heavily, staring down at me as his other hand rolled a condom over his cock. He lubed himself up, never breaking eye contact, and I found myself falling into the shimmering sapphire of his eyes as he pulled my legs apart, tilting my hole up toward him. 

"Do it, Josh," I whispered. "Fuck me." 

Josh dropped onto me again, his chest crushing against mine, my cock throbbing against his flexing abs as his strong arms pushed my legs open wide, his hands sliding over my thighs, the fingers digging in almost painfully. As Josh attacked the side of my neck with his mouth, sucking and biting, and rolling his tongue over my collarbone, he pushed all the way into me in one long, deep slide, impaling me on his cock as my hands slid down his back to his flexing ass, squeezing the granite curves as I pulled him deeper into me. I threw my head back, my moan of pleasure almost a yelp, and saw Justin still watching us, the same half-lidded expression of lust on his face as his hand rubbed over the outline of his cock through the pajamas. 

I rolled my head back again as Josh slid close to me, his lips seeking mine as his cock pounded into me. I felt Josh's nipples brushing against mine as his whole body flexed and unflexed, his chest crushing against me as his tongue pushed into my mouth and I sucked greedily at it. My hands roamed up and down his back, brushing his ribs, feeling the muscles fold and unfold as I followed the curve of his spine and gripped again at his ass. Josh reared up off of me, kneeling again, his hands on my hips as he pounded into me. Sweat rolled down his chest, slicking his muscles in the light from the hall, and he tossed his head back, flicking his hair out of his eyes, thrusting into me with machine like intensity. His face was a mix of lust and pleasure as he gazed down at me, our eyes locked as one of my hands slid up his chest, tweaking his right nipple before sliding up to caress his corded neck and the smooth lines of his face. My other hand continued to pull at his ass, urging him into me. 

"Yeah, Jack, yeah," he panted at me, his hands digging into my hips as he pulled me against him in time to his pounding thrusts. 

"Do it, Josh," I encouraged, pulling at him with both hands, one still on the hard flexing muscle of his ass and the other gripping his neck. 

The bed squeaked as it rocked back and forth, the blanket wrapped headboard smacking against the wall. I wasn't sure how much Britney would be able to hear next door, but I was sure Chris was laying in bed downstairs pointing his middle fingers at the ceiling and clutching pillows to his ears. He was probably laughing, too. 

Josh abruptly stopped pounding into me, and let go of my hips. 

"Josh?" I asked, surprised. 

His hands slid up my sweat-slick torso to my shoulders. 

"Roll," he whispered, nipping at my neck again. 

I turned beneath him, and felt his wet cock slide between my ass cheeks before pushing inside me again. He pulled me up, so that I was on all fours as he resumed pounding into me from behind, and I threw myself back against him in time to his thrusts, feeling his balls smacking against mine each time our his collided. His strong hands squeezed and pulled at my shoulders as he knelt behind me, drawing almost all the way out on every stroke before thrusting all the way back in. He leaned down, nibbling at the back of my neck, and I turned, capturing his mouth for a quick kiss before he looked over me to Justin. 

Justin was still in the chair across from us, sprawled across it, legs flung wide. His wide eyes were on Josh and I, and his hand was now inside his pajamas, working away at his cock. His expression of dazed lust matched Josh's own, and I could see the firm muscles of his arm flexing as he stroked himself feverishly, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead, his t-shirt tight against his muscled torso, his nipples pushing out from his chest. 

I'd never had sex while someone watched before. Hell, I'd never had sex with more than one person in the room before, not even in college when I had to share a room with my roommate. Somehow, though, watching Justin watch us while he jerked himself off was an incredible turn on for me. I was guessing that it was for Josh, too, based on his intensity. He continued pounding into me, his abs flexing against my back, his skin sliding over mine, his nipples digging into my shoulder blades as his mouth worried back and forth over my neck and shoulders. I felt his hands slide up my chest as he brought his arms through mine, gripping the front of my shoulders now as he began to thrust into me in quick jabs that matched the yelping intakes of his reedy breath. 

"Jack, Jack, Jack," he panted, pounding into me. 

With a final yelping groan I felt his hips spasm against me as he thrust in deeply again, his fingers digging into my shoulders as he collapsed against my back. Feeling him jerk into me, I slowly slid down into the bed, Josh crushing me into the mattress as he panted my name, kissing the side of my face. 

Even as we sank down, Josh spent and twitching atop me, Justin seemed to come to a decision, and stood from the chair with dreamy slowness. He grabbed the bottom of his gray shirt with both hands, and tugged it over his head in one long flex of his body, arms bulging. The ladder of his abs slid into view with every inch the rising cloth revealed, and then the smooth plates of his chest, capped by his bulging pink nipples, larger and rounder than Josh's, the tips jutting out, round and thick as peas. Justin tugged the shirt over his head, tossing it aside, and dropped his gaze to mine, our eyes locking. My hard cock ground into the bed as I watched Justin's hands drop to his waist and tug the pajama pants and his briefs down in languidly slow motion. 

His cock sprang out, full and heavy, arcing upward from a nest of honey curls. I'd seen it the other day, but not like this, not hard and ready, the deep pink head slick. It bobbed slightly as Justin walked toward us, looking down at me. Josh slid off of my back, laying next to me as Justin approached the bed, his golden hair shining and backlit from the hallway, his muscled form a study in male lust, his face lined with need. The two of us looked up at Justin, following the ridges and curves of his body as he looked down at us past the jutting spike of his hard cock, standing at attention above us. 

"Please," Justin whispered, his voice deep and cracking hoarsely. 

His cock throbbed in front of me, a pearly drop of precum seeping out from his slit, and I leaned forward, my tongue stretching out to catch it. As if my movement broke a spell, Josh suddenly leaned forward as well, and both our mouths attacked Justin's hard tool as he brought his hands to the back of our heads, groaning loudly. My mouth folded over his head, my tongue washing over him and savoring the flavor, saltier than Josh's, as Josh swiped his tongue eagerly down Justin's cock. 

Justin let loose a series of high pitched sighs and moans above us as Josh and I fought wetly over his cock. The two of us moved with a kind of dreamy precision over Justin, our heads turning to avoid colliding with each other, our noses brushing as we moved in opposite directions over the silken flesh of Justin's cock. I released his head, painting down the underside of his prick even as Josh rolled his lips over the top, replacing my own. Justin's fingers clutched at my hair as I licked and sucked at his balls, while Josh swallowed him above me. I curled one arm around Justin's firm, strong thigh, and caressed Josh's back with my other even as I felt one of Josh's hands joining Justin's in my hair, pulling me toward him. 

Our mouths met with the head of Justin's cock between them, our tongues crawling over it and each other. Justin was sighing above us, his head thrown back, eyes closed, as Josh and I both washed over him at once. Justin's legs began to shake, and moving again as one Josh and I slid off of him and pulled him onto the bed. Pressing Justin back against the pillows, he groaned helplessly as our mouths crawled all over him. 

Josh pushed one of Justin's arms up and began to suck noisily at his armpit even as I slid down and fastened onto one of his nipples, my lips making a tight circle around it as I rolled the tip with my tongue. I nipped lightly at it, tugging with my teeth, and Justin groaned, his back arching, even as Josh slid onto the other nipple, twirling his tongue over it and then blowing on it softly before fastening his mouth over it. Justin's hands were still twined through both our hair, and I found myself fascinated with the way his skin could feel so similar, but so different, from Josh's as I licked my way across the curving expanse of his chest. My mouth slid over his adam's apple, and my tongue traced the cords of his neck as I licked and kissed my way up the underside of his chin, even as Josh moved down, painting a wide track across Justin's abs as he worked his way inexorably toward Justin's dripping, throbbing cock. I licked and sucked my way up the side of Justin's face, nibbling on his earlobe as Josh's stretched lips slid back down over his cock like a glove. 

"Is this what you wanted, Justin?" I whispered into his ear, my lips brushing against his cheek. I looked down to see Josh swallowing him, again and again. "Is this what you wanted?" 

"Yes," Justin groaned, his hand tugging at my head, his other still gripping Josh's hair tightly. 

Justin writhed beneath us on the mattress, his muscles quivering and straining as our sweaty bodies pressed against him. The sheets were in complete disarray beneath us, twisted and pulled from the mattress. Justin was a little more muscular than Josh, at least in his upper body, and I could feel the differences in strength as he shifted beneath me, pulling my head toward his with one strong arm. My lips met Justin's as Josh continued sucking his pole. Justin, unlike Josh, wasn't a tongue kisser, but I felt the firm pressure of his lips on mine as I pushed my tongue inside, tasting and brushing against his. 

"Yes," Justin groaned again, his hips thrusting up from the bed as I began to work my way down again. 

In one long, slow curve, my tongue slid down Justin's jaw, over the cords of his neck again, through the hollow of his throat, and across his nipple, even as Josh washed a slow path back up, from Justin's cock to his crunching abs, and then up the broad curve of his heaving chest. We leaned across Justin for just a moment, our lips brushing each other, tongues dueling in our linked mouths, before I dipped lower and Josh fastened onto Justin's nipple again. 

I licked and sucked my way down Justin's abs, my tongue sliding over the faint amber trail of hair below his navel before it collided with the weeping head of his cock. Justin wasn't as long as Josh, but seemed a fraction wider, giving my tongue more room to play as I slurped my way down to his balls again, hanging low in his crinkly sack. Justin's tanned, supple skin seemed warm, the way skin will after a sunburn, and I relished the feel of it as I ran my hands over his strong, flexing legs. I pulled one ball into my mouth, sucking lightly, before releasing it and doing the same to the other, and Justin thrust his hips toward my face as I began to lick my way up his cock again, in short, catlike strokes. Above me, Josh was drifting back and forth over Justin's chest, working at one nipple, and then the other, pulling and sucking at them as Justin continued to sigh and moan beneath our combined assault. 

Justin began to thrust into my mouth with more urgency as he began to groan and grunt loudly above me. Unlike Josh, whose breathing turned to little yelps and squeaks, Justin's began to get deeper, more bass, as he twisted and jerked on the bed. Josh slid up his chest, taking Justin's face in his hand and pulling him toward him as he jammed his tongue deeply into Justin's mouth, moaning against him. I snaked a hand up Justin's thighs as I sucked faster and stronger on his pole, bobbing my head as my fingers crept toward his ass. Brushing one, feather light, over his hole, I felt Justin's whole body tense, all of the muscles standing rigidly against each other, as he grunted loudly. 

I pulled off of his cock just before the first jet of sperm shot out onto his chest, glistening amid the heaving, sweaty muscle, and Justin grunted, his hips jerking again and again as he painted rope after rope of cum over his chest and abs. I licked my way over his cock, feeling it jerk beneath me as he tried to push my head away, groaning in pleasure as Josh slid down, licking the cum off his chest. Josh and I crawled over his torso, licking and cleaning, before I slid off of Justin, spooning myself back against Josh as Justin lay on his back, panting. Josh kissed the back of my neck softly, over and over. 

Justin rolled toward me, his blue eyes open, and stared at us both before looking down at my crotch. 

"You haven't cum, yet," he whispered, his voice low. 

"Why don't you help him out?" Josh suggested breathily, over my shoulder. He was smiling encouragingly at Justin, and then went back to licking the nape of my neck. 

Justin reached out slowly, his hand trembling, and brushed the backs of his fingers over my chest. I stared into his dark blue eyes, darker than Josh's, and saw the uncertainty there, mixed with lust, as he flattened his hand against my chest. Josh continued kissing my neck and shoulders, and I felt him moving around behind me, and heard a condom tearing open. 

"Don't do anything you don't want to, Justin," I said softly. 

He blinked, and looked at me again. 

"But I do want to, Jack," he sighed. "I've just never." 

"You're doing fine," I whispered encouragingly as he moved his hand cautiously across my chest, feeling one of my hard nipples. 

Justin's hand slid down my chest and over my abs, both of us watching it, his eyes wide as if his hand had a mind of its own. Both of us inhaled sharply as his fingers finally hit my cock, wrapping around it. He squeezed, gently, watching my face. 

"God, that's hot," Josh panted from behind me, watching over my shoulder. 

Slowly, tentatively, Justin began to work his fingers up and down my cock. He stopped to feel, or squeeze, tracing his fingertips over the crown, around the ridge, over every bump and vein in my shaft. As his fingers drifted down, tugging lightly on my balls, rolling them in his hand, kneading them softly, I felt Josh lift my leg, and then begin sliding into me again. 

"Oh, yeah, Josh," I sighed, pushing back against him, clenching my ass around him. 

Josh began to slowly thrust in and out of me, his arm laced through mine, hand on my shoulder, as Justin resumed his tentative fondling of my cock, his hand growing a little more bolder as he grew more sure of himself, watching my face continuously for signs that I was enjoying it. Josh began to kiss the back of my neck again, panting my name, as Justin stroked harder, watching me watching him. 

As Josh continued to push into me, increasing his speed, Justin sped up as well, matching Josh's thrusts. My cock was leaking like a faucet as I shuddered between the two of them. 

"Is this good?" Justin asked softly. His face was a mask of innocent hopefulness. "I'm doing ok?" 

"Yes, Justin, yes," I panted, pushing back against Josh again as I felt him sliding and brushing against me. 

Josh leaned over my shoulder again, tugging at my ear with his teeth, staring at Justin. 

"You know what's even better, Justin?" Josh asked softly. Justin stared at him, his mouth hanging open. "Suck him, Justin. Suck his cock." 

Justin looked from Josh's face to mine, and back again, before glancing down at my cock, sliding through his half open fist. He looked at us again, his pink tongue flicking out over his bottom lip, and then he began to slide down the bed toward my cock. Josh, watching over my shoulder, began to thrust faster, and even harder, as Justin leaned forward, his tongue out as he flicked it tentatively, barely touching the head of my cock with it. My hips jerked involuntarily toward him, my cockhead smearing across his lips before his tongue flicked out again. 

"Oh, God," I sighed. 

"That's so fucking hot," Josh panted in my ear. "Suck him, Justin." 

Justin began to lap at my cock like a kitten with a bowl of milk. In the same way that his hand had slowly explored me, Justin gently traced his tongue over me, touching all the same places as I sighed above him. I dropped a hand down to caress the curved stubbled shape of Justin's skull as he looked up at me, again checking my face for signs of approval. Leaning forward, he carefully rolled his lips over the head of my cock, finally closing his eyes as I moaned with pleasure. Behind me, Josh continued hammering away, sliding easily in and out of my already well-used ass as he watched Justin over my shoulder. Justin began to slowly bob up and down on my cock, sucking gently. 

"Oh, yeah, Justin," I sighed encouragingly when he began to use his tongue more. 

Justin began to suck faster, washing his tongue over my cock, trying to match the speed of Josh's thrusts. I jerked back and forth between them as the three of us fell into a rhythm. Reaching down, I caressed the side of Justin's face and neck, gently, as he nuzzled against my hand, my cock never leaving his mouth. With wave after wave of unbelievable pleasure and lust rolling through my body, I knew I wouldn't be able to hold out much longer, and I warned Justin. 

"Justin, I'm almost there," I panted. 

He pulled off of my cock and slid up the bed again, replacing his mouth with his hand, and began jerking me again, hard and fast, even as Josh pounded against me. I was moaning and sighing both of their names, and then suddenly I was over the edge, my hips jerking as I shot my load all over Justin's hand and the bed. Josh leaned over, grabbing Justin's hand, and brought it to his mouth, licking my cum off and sucking Justin's fingers in as he groaned and spilled his second load into my ass. 

The three of us sank, panting, into the bed. 

"That was amazing," I panted, completely spent, into my pillow. 

I felt like I'd done about five workouts in a row, or jogged a couple marathons. 

"Yeah," Josh agreed, cleaning himself off and then tossing the tissues aside. One of us would have to clean them up in the morning. 

The three of us fell asleep like that, me spooned against Josh, Justin on his back, panting, with my arm flung casually across his firm, sweaty chest. I woke up sometime in the night, briefly, and realized we were all snuggled in closer, arms everywhere, legs tangled, and then fell back asleep. 

I was the first one awake in the morning. Sunlight was creeping softly around the shades, spilling across the three bodies on the bed. The sheets were twisted everywhere, and I was still between Josh and Justin, although we'd spread apart a little. Josh was sleeping face down, his bare ass in the air, and Justin was pointed toward me on his side. I let my eyes wander over the curves of both their bodies, noting the scratches and bite marks that I was sure I also had. Justin's cock lay across his hip, full, but not hard, and his face was completely smooth as he drooled into his pillow. 

I slid out from between them and fished my boxers out of the tangled piles of clothing strewn across the floor before padding silently into the bathroom to quickly pee and brush my teeth. Not wanting to wake either of them, I partially closed the bedroom door, and went in to quietly argue the coffeemaker into working before I settled onto the couch with my book. 

Justin was up next, repeating my earlier actions. He glanced at me when he came out of the bathroom, on his way to the other bedroom. 

"Hey," I said. 

"Hey," he answered quickly. 

Justin closed the door of the second bedroom, and emerged a few minutes later dressed casually and even kind of sloppily in a t-shirt and track pants. He stepped into his sneakers without talking to me, and ducked back into mine and Josh's room to scoop up his clothes from last night. I watched from the couch, wondering if I should say something or if I should wait for him. 

"Good morning," Josh said sleepily from the bed. 

"Oh, hi, good morning," Justin stammered quietly. 

"Where you going?" Josh asked, climbing out of bed and stepping into his boxer briefs. 

"I need some air," Justin said, tossing his clothes into the second bedroom as Josh followed him I stood. 

"Justin, are you ok?" I asked carefully. 

He glanced at me, his face twisted yet oddly unreadable at the same time. 

"No," he answered, and then shook his head. "Yes. I mean, I just need to go think. I'm going to the gym." 

He walked quickly out the door as I called his name again, but he didn't look back. Behind me, Josh sighed, and I turned to see him staring after Justin. 

"I'm gonna get in the shower, " Josh said quickly, walking toward the bathroom. 

"Want some company?" I asked. 

Josh didn't answer as he closed the bathroom door behind him. 

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