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Monday, November 5th, was the date of Kevin’s next check-up with the doctor. I drove him to the office, went into the examination room with him, at Kevin’s request, so I was there for moral support as the doctor began to finger his testicles. I caught a look of concern as it crossed the doctor’s face and was nervous about what that simple gesture might imply. The doctor continued his examination of Kevin’s scrotal sac and then turned to speak to me.
“I’m afraid there’s seems another small lump on the testicle,” he announced. “I think we’d better run more tests, so we can better determine the nature of this growth.”
A look of fear covered Kevin’s face and I had a good idea what was going through his mind. “How soon can we do that?” I asked the doctor.
“I’ll set it up for first thing tomorrow morning,” our physician informed us. “Can you have him at the hospital by seven?”
“We’ll be there, so don’t worry,” I replied. I happened to look over at Kevin as the doctor left the room, and his face was drained of all blood. He was very pale, his eyes were moist, his body was trembling and I could only guess that his heart was beating at a supersonic rate.
“Relax, Kevin,” I suggested. “We made it through this before and we’ll do it again. I promise.”
“But why does this have to happen to me again?” he wanted to know. “Why am I the one that these things keep happening to?”
“You aren’t the only one,” I countered, “but I agree that you’ve had to deal with more than your share of problems. You mustn’t panic or let this affect you to the point where you also begin to suffer from other problems. Your brothers and I will be by your side through this whole ordeal, just like we were before, and you’re going to beat this again. Heck, it may just turn out to be another cyst.”
“Yeah, okay. I guess you’re right,” he hesitantly conceded. “I promise I won’t panic until we get the test results back, but I’m still going to be a little scared.”
“I’ll can live with that,” I informed him, “but don’t forget that you have more support than most kids in your situation would have. Take advantage of that fact and it will make things easier for you.”
“I will, Dad, and I know you’re right. It’s just that I can’t help myself sometimes,” he admitted, shyly.
“I understand that too, and you’ll be fine, as long as you don’t overdo it.” I was trying to get him to relax, but I was more than a little nervous about what this might portend for him.
“Okay, I’ll try not to,” he agreed, but I wondered if it was just to humor me.
“That’s my boy,” I offered, in hopes of showing him my support. “Now, let’s go home and fill the others in about what’s going on.”
“Do we have to?” Kevin whined. “I mean, couldn’t we wait until we get the test results back?”
“We can, if that’s what you want,” I agreed, “but they’re going to notice when you don’t go to school with them tomorrow.”
“Yeah, I suppose they will,” Kevin realized. “Let’s just tell them it’s normal precautionary testing and not let them know the doctor found another lump. Dustin’s just getting better and I don’t want him to worry, unless we know it’s serious. Okay?”
“Yes, I’ll go along with you, if that’s what you want,” I agreed. “You know, besides being quite brave, you’re also a pretty smart kid, Kevin. I guess that’s what makes me love you even more.” We hugged and then Kevin got dressed. We left the medical office and drove directly home, but the ride home was very quiet. I wished there were something I could do to take away his fear, but realized only he could do that. I might be able to ease those fears slightly, but only he could eliminate them completely.
When we arrived home, Pat told me that Judge Shay had called to speak with me. He left a number for me to call him back. I dialed the number and the judge answered the phone on the second ring.
“Josh, I’m sorry to bother you at this time,” he began, after we exchanged greetings, “since I know you have many other things going on, but I really need the kind of help that only you can provide. I have a sixteen year old that I’m getting a mixture of reports about. The professionals are severely split over this kid’s potential for rehabilitation. I was hoping you might be able to take him in for a couple of weeks, so I could also get your take about him, before I have to make a final judgment about what to do with him. What do you say?”
“This is really not the best time,” I began, “but I’ve told you before that we won’t turn down any boy who truly could benefit from our help. I might have to rely on input from my sons about him, but we will give you our honest interpretation of how we view his attitude and actions.”
“Thanks, that’s all I could hope for,” Steve acknowledged. “Would it be possible for me to bring him over shortly? He’s been seated in my outer office all afternoon.”
“Sure, bring him on over,” I agreed. “I’ll fill the boys in about his arrival and we’ll expect you, say in forty minutes or so?’
“Excellent. I’ll see you then.”
I hung up the phone and called all the boys together in the living room. After the last one straggled in, I explained to them about the new guest who was on the way and then I let them know about Kevin. I merely told them that he was be having some precautionary tests run tomorrow morning and they would all have to get up early and go with us, as I wouldn’t have time to make two trips. I would drop Kevin off at the hospital, go in with him briefly, to make sure that he was all set, after which I’d come back out and drive them to school. Once I dropped them off, I’d come back to stay with Kevin until his tests were completed.
There were a few questions, but everyone took our explanation at face value and no alarms went off. I asked Danny to call and order pizza to be delivered, seeing it was getting too late for me to try to make dinner, especially since we would soon be having another visitor. Ricky and Cole offered to make a salad, and Trey and Pat said they would set the table. I told them to add two extra places, just in case we could talk the judge into joining us.
Steve and the new kid arrived just about on schedule and I greeted them at the door. The judge introduced the boy as Frankie Hopkins and I made introductions all around. However, Frankie didn’t seem to be interested in learning the other boys’ names, as the introductions were being made. He seemed more than a little aloof.
Frankie had black hair and brown eyes, stood about 5’11” tall, with broad shoulders and a solid, but not muscle-bound body. He definitely wasn’t a boy. The only one from my group who could rival him for build was Dustin. My first impression was that he was a tough, street-wise kid, but I would try not to form any preconceptions about him and continue to give him the benefit of the doubt. When Frankie went back out to the car with the judge to get his things, I held a quick meeting with the boys.
“Something tells me you’ll need to curtail your after-shower nudist romps, at least until we can gauge how he might react to something like that. I’ll let him have my room for tonight and I’ll sleep down here.”
“Dad,” Kevin spoke up. I was hoping to sleep with you tonight, if you didn’t mind. I know it’s just routine check-up, but I’m still kind of nervous about tomorrow.”
“And if Kevin sleeps with you,” Dustin added, “Trey can come in with me and Frankie can use Trey’s room.”
“Do all of you agree with that?” I asked, just to make sure.
The three of them nodded, just as Frankie and the judge reentered the house. I looked up at Frankie and spoke. “I guess we’ve just settled the sleeping arrangements, so the boys will show you where to put your things and then they’ll show you around the place.”
Danny and Dustin soon became the official welcoming committee, seeing they were the oldest and nearest to Frankie in age. I was going to include Kevin in on that too, but he was clinging to me and didn’t seem to want to break free. Instead, we sat down in the living room with Judge Shay and chatted briefly. Steve even accepted our offer to stay for dinner.
“That sounds fine with me,” Steve admitted. “Tonight is my wife’s bridge night and I’d have to fend for myself anyway, so pizza and salad sound just fine.”
Those of us who’d stayed behind continued our discussion, until the others came in to join us. They explained they had taken Frankie’s things to the room and had also given him a quick tour of the house, finishing just as the doorbell rang, signaling the pizza had arrived. After paying the delivery guy, we all went into the dining room and sat down to eat.
Frankie wasn’t very talkative and I wondered if it was because Judge Shay was still with us. After we finished off the pizzas, I excused myself and went out to the kitchen to retrieve the butterscotch pudding I had thrown together the previous evening and put in the fridge to set up. Fortuitous maybe, but I like to think of it as good planning. Graham ran to the cupboard for me and pulled out the dessert bowls and I dished the pudding out to all those who wanted some. The judge stayed and chatted for a while longer, before he bid us adieu and thanked me once again for everything. The boys and I walked him out to his car and then waved at him as he drove away.
Now that Steve was gone, the rest of us adjourned to the family room for some down time. Pat, Trey and Cole offered to clean up and I accepted their help gratefully. I tried to engage Frankie in conversation, so I could find out more about him, but he was pretty close-mouthed and wouldn’t divulge much information. I warned him about the unusually early wake-up call for tomorrow and he didn’t seem very pleased about that news either. Even though it seemed particularly early, I chased the younger boys off to bed at eight and the older ones at nine, because of our earlier wake up hour.
Frankie balked at going, so I let Dustin, Danny and him stay up for another hour, after getting their promise they wouldn’t give me any hassles when I went to wake them up in the morning.
I chose to go up when Kevin did, because I didn’t want to leave him alone at this point. We undressed and got into bed. I was just getting comfortable, when I felt Kevin sidle over against me. Without hesitation, I wrapped my arm around his upper body and pulled him into my chest.
“What do you think is going to happen, Dad?” he asked, softly.
“I think we’re going to wait and see, just like we did the last time,” I told him, honestly. “I don’t want to start speculating about possible outcomes, because that could lead us in all directions. Like I said in the doctor’s office, you beat this before and you’ll do it again. We’re all going to be there for you, so you won’t be going through this alone. No matter what happens, Kevin, I’ll be by your side and holding your hand.”
“I know you will; otherwise I don’t think I could do this again,” he replied, still looking extremely nervous. “Just hold me tonight, will you Dad? I always feel safer when I’m wrapped up in your arms.”
“Most definitely. I’ll hold you forever if that’s what you need,” I assured him. “Good night, Kev. I’ll see you in the morning.”
I held Kevin tightly to my body throughout the night. I know he didn’t fall asleep right away and neither did I. We were both worried about his situation, although I wasn’t about to let him see my deep concern. We did eventually drift off and I think we both managed three or four hours’ worth of slumber, before my alarm rudely woke us again.
I hurried the boys through their morning routines and then drove to the hospital. After directing Kevin back to the area where he would be having his first test done, I had the receptionist logged him in. After that had been accomplished, we went over to the waiting area. Before he sat down, I gave him a hug, told him I’d be back shortly and then left to drop off the others at school. I told them I’d pick them up at the regular time and encouraged them to try and have a good day. They all exited in silence, until Trey turned back and spoke to me.
“Tell Kevin that we’re all thinking about him and praying for him,” he told me. I hoped that would mean as much to Kevin as it just did to me.
“I will, Trey, and thanks,” I responded.
When I got back to the hospital, Kevin had already been taken in for his tests. Even though I couldn’t have gone with him for this anyway, I was still disappointed that I missed him. Quietly, I sat in the waiting area and half-heartedly looked at a magazine I’d picked up from one of the tables. It was a couple of hours before I saw my boy again. When he came out after being poked, pricked, prodded and pictured, I took him out to lunch before we returned to school.
“Trey wanted me to tell you they were all thinking about you and praying for you. It seems you’ve made quite a friend there,” I remarked.
“Yeah, Dusty and I have sort of included him with us for now,” Kevin admitted. “Dusty is really pretty cool with Trey now and it gives us the numbers to defend against the terrible trio.” He said the last part with a sly grin and I laughed at his comment.
“I suppose safety in numbers is a prime consideration, especially when it comes to the junior devil brigade,” I teased, “but I’m happy that you and Dustin worked things out so you can also include Trey. He’s so shy that I was worried he might end up being a loner here.”
“Are you kidding me? Nobody can get away with being a loner at our house,” Kevin mocked. “One way or another, one of us will bring him into the group. Just look at everything that’s happened, if you don’t believe me. Ricky took Cole and Graham under his wings, even though we’ve all paid dearly for it. Danny roped in Pat and we took in Trey. You don’t have to worry, Dad, we’ll find a way for everyone to fit in. Danny and Pat have already asked Frankie to hang with them, although we think we’re going to have to cool the sex for a while, until we learn more about him. He’s not willing to open up to any of us yet or tell us anything about himself, no matter how hard we try. We’ll find a way though. I know we will.”
“I hope so,” I replied, still worried about how this new guy was going to fit in. “Let’s get going. We both need to get back to our schools.”
We got in the van and Kevin asked me another question. “Dad, how long do you think it will be before we hear from the doctor?”
“Most likely it will take a couple of days, just like last time,” I explained. “We should probably hear something by Friday. If not, I’ll call the doctor’s office Monday morning.” He seemed satisfied with that answer, so I didn’t comment further.
I dropped Kevin off at the high school and then proceeded on to my own school. It seemed with everything that had been going on, I’ve had to leave my assistant principal or the head teacher in charge more than I would have liked to. I guess I’ll have to buy them both a special gift for Christmas, along with one for my secretary, to let them know how much I appreciate all the times they’ve covered for me, while I took care of my boys.
The afternoon went quickly, as my desk was loaded with work from while I was away, and it seemed like I had only just begun to get into the stack, when I discovered it was already time to pick up my sons. After loading the younger ones in, I drove to the high school to pick up the rest. Everyone was there except for Frankie.
“Where’s our new boy?” I asked, as the others hopped inside.
“He told me to tell you that he’d have some of his friends bring him home,” Danny reported.
“Did you tell him he should be home by dinnertime?” I asked.
“Yeah, I did,” he informed me. “I told him you insisted we all eat together, except for when we have games or emergencies.”
“Well, I hope he listened to you,” I mumbled.
We drove home and raced into the house, as it was beginning to rain. I sent the boys off to do their homework, while I started dinner. Tonight we’d have meatloaf, mashed potatoes and corn. It took over an hour before it was ready, and Frankie still wasn’t home by the time I was putting it on the table. We ate and the boys cleaned up afterward, but Frankie still wasn’t home. After we went in to watch some television, the boys began slipping off, a few at a time, to get ready for bed. Just as I was about to send the last of the boys off, a car pulled up and dropped Frankie off. It was a little after nine, so I went out and met him at the door.
“Let’s go into the office to talk,” I told him.
Frankie rolled his eyes and then followed me to the office. Once we entered, I pointed toward a chair, as an indication that I wanted him to sit in it, while I shut the door. Once we were alone, I walked over and sat in the chair at my desk. “Frankie, I don’t have a zillion rules here, but there are some things I expect from all of the boys. One of them is that everyone will be home for dinner. I think you knew that.”
“We had car troubles,” he responded, while looking bored.
“So how come you didn’t call?” I wanted to know.
“I couldn’t remember the phone number,” he mouthed. His answers seemed much too simple and rehearsed.
“What about looking it up in the phone book?” I pressed.
“Didn’t think of that,” he replied.
“Let’s put it this way,” I stated, succinctly. “I do give you boys enough room to make your own mistakes and the opportunity to learn and grow from them, so count this as your mistake. I don’t want this to be repeated and I encourage you to learn what is expected of you here and then act accordingly. Any questions?”
“I guess not,” he answered dryly.
“Then go get ready for bed and you can turn in for the evening,” I suggested. “If you have any questions about what I expect from you, then ask me and I’ll explain everything to you. Otherwise, I don’t want any more problems. Am I clear?” Frankie merely nodded his head in reply, while making a face showing his disgust.
He left the room, but I could tell from just watching his body language that most of what I said went in one ear and out the other, that’s if it even entered at all. This boy was going to be a challenge. I just hope I’m up for it. I went back to the family room to join the older boys and watch the end of the program we had been viewing. Now that it had ended, we all turned in.
The week had been quite trying and I was happy when Friday finally arrived. I was in my office at school, just before lunch, when I got a phone call. It was Kevin’s doctor and he told me he had the test results back. He wanted me to bring Kevin by after school, so we could discuss them. Although I pressed him to share the details with me now, he refused to give me even the slightest clue over the phone. If I wanted to learn what he’d discovered, I’d have to come to his office and then he’d explain it to both of us at the same time.
The lack of information concerned me, but I didn’t want to push the panic button prematurely. I called the high school and asked them to tell Kevin to meet me out in front of the school right after his last class and they said they’d do that for me. As anticipated, for the rest of the school day I was consumed with thoughts about Kevin’s situation. I informed the assistant principal and head teacher I would be leaving a little early again, so I could take Kevin back to the doctor’s office, and they both wished us luck.
I pulled up in front of the high school, just as the first wave of students was exiting the building. It wasn’t long before I saw Kevin heading in my direction and then enter the van.
“What’s up, Dad?” he asked me.
“The doctor called and said your test results are back,” I explained. “He wanted me to bring you down after school.”
“Did he tell you what he found?” Kevin asked, with a look of concern suddenly appearing on his face.
“No, he said he’d tell us both at the same time,” I informed him.
Our trip to the office was in total silence. I think we both had various scenarios running around in our heads, as we tried to mentally prepare ourselves for what was to come. When we finally entered the waiting room, we announced our presence to the front desk and then took our seats. We sat there for about twenty minutes, before we were led into one of the examination rooms. We ended up having to wait at least another ten minutes for the doctor to arrive.
Kevin didn’t really sit down to wait, once we were in the examination room. Instead, he paced around the small area like an animal in a cage, until I pulled him down into my lap and wrapped my arms around him. He looked at me and I could tell he was on the verge of tears.
“I’m scared shitless, Dad,” he confessed
“I know. I guess I am too,” I admitted. “However, it won’t be much longer before we know what the doctor discovered. Just breathe deeply and try to relax. It won’t do you any good to get all worked up beforehand.”
“I’ll try, but I can’t promise I’ll be able to do it,” he replied.
“Just try, then,” I urged.
We sat there for a couple of more minutes, before the door opened and the doctor walked in. We exchanged greetings and then got down to business.
“I’ve gone over the results of Kevin’s tests and I’ve even shown them to two of my colleagues,” he began, which I interpreted to mean he thought he had discovered something serious. “We’ve all reached the same conclusion. It appears this new lump is a tumor and we collectively recommend that we remove the diseased testicle as soon as possible. It’s the same one that caused the problem previously.”
Kevin’s mouth fell open and the tears started flowing down his cheeks. I hugged him tightly, as he was still on my lap, and leaned my head against his.
“I know this is scary, Kevin” the doctor continued, “but I think we’ve discussed all the important facts before, which is it won’t make you any less of a man and you can still function normally with only one testicle. We do feel it is imperative that we remove it in the very near future, though, before the cancer begins to metastasize and spread to other parts of your body. We’ve tentatively scheduled your operation for a week from today, if you agree to go through with it. This will give you a few days to consider your options, before you have to make a decision, but I don’t want this to linger longer than a week. Go home, talk it over with your dad and brothers and you can let me know your answer by noon on Monday,” he emphasized.
“Kevin, I don’t want to mislead you,” the doctor added, in a soothing tone. “This is dangerous, but at this point, it is not life threatening. I believe that by removing the offending testicle, it will eliminate your problem and you will be able to live a long and healthy life. You’ve been very brave already and I have confidence you will continue to face this with the same courage and make the right choice.”
We thanked the doctor and left his office. Once we were in the van, I asked Kevin if there were someplace special he’d like to go. He declined, explaining he was too emotional to be seen in public. For that reason, I merely drove him around for a while, before we went back to pick up his brothers and head home. No one said a word, as I surmised each had guessed the results of the tests after seeing Kevin’s face, as he sat in the front seat. You could have heard a pin drop at any time during the entire ride home and that’s something, considering there were nine boys involved.
As we entered the house, Kevin bolted up to his room and the other boys cornered me in the living room, demanding to know what was up. I explained to them what the doctor had told us, and then I also informed them about the option the doctor had recommended. I could see them all mentally crossing their legs as I said it and then Dustin rushed off to comfort his brother, his friend and his lover. I made the other boys stay downstairs, so the two of them could have some time alone. Frankie wanted to know why they were so close, so I explained they had been together for a long time, having been in the same foster home before they came here, and were also best friends. He accepted that explanation and let it drop without further comment.
Up in the bedroom, Dustin was holding Kevin and they were both crying. When they had both achieved a modicum of control, he whispered in Kevin’s ear. “It will be all right, babe. We’re all here for you. You’ll still be the same man I love and nothing will change, except you’ll have one less part. I love you, Kevy, and I’ll be here for you, not matter what you have to go through.”